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Monday Oct 04, 2021
Monday Oct 04, 2021
156. Science and Art of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage, Part 2
"Therefore my people have gone into captivity, Because they have no knowledge;" Isaiah 5:13 NKJV
Questions and Topics We Discuss:
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Will you elaborate on the science of sex?
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When two become one, what has God designed to occur at a hormonal level?
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What is your best list of benefits that come from a husband and wife connecting sexually on a regular basis?
Jesus captured Francie’s heart at a young age, and she has been on an adventure following Him since then, fueled by a love for His word and His presence.
As a young woman Francie served in Mother Theresa’s home for the dying in Kolkata, sat in brothels with girls trapped in the sex trade of Chang Mai, slept in the bush of Namibia to reach tribal people and orphans with the Gospel of Jesus, visited the homes of the poor in the Dominican Republic, and helped with the rebuilding and development of a village in Sri Lanka after the 2004 tsunami.
For the past few years, Francie has been focused on writing and speaking about God’s good gift of intimacy in marriage. She’s been featured on Christianity Today’s blog and Moody Radio, The Don’t Mom Alone Podcast, and Java with Juli, and several others as she shares about the power of sex in marriage. Most recently, she’s launched a podcast called Heaven in Your Home where she talks all about sex, marriage and the mission of God.
In it all, Francie is passionate about inviting others to experience God’s tangible love that has the ability to transform every area of life.
Francie has a BA in Political Science and a Masters degree in Evangelism and Leadership from Wheaton College in Wheaton, Il. She currently lives in the suburbs of Washington DC with her six kids and husband.
Episodes with Dr. Michael Sytsma on The Savvy Sauce:
Ten Common Questions About Sex, Shared Through a Biblical Worldview
Enjoying a God-Honoring, Healthy Sex Life with Your Spouse
Desire Discrepancy in Marriage with Dr. Michael Sytsma
Remaining Sexually Engaged Through the Years with Dr. Michael Sytsma (Paying Patrons Only)
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Francie's Green Superfood Recommendation
Recommended Resources to Learn about Sex:
Enjoy! The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women
The Married Guy's Guide to Great Sex
Additional Recommended Resources at www.thesavvysauce.com
Thank You to Our Sponsor: WinShape Marriage
Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website
Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Monday Sep 27, 2021
Monday Sep 27, 2021
155. Sex in Marriage and Its Positive Effects with Francie Winslow, Part 1
**Transcription Below**
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." Philippians 2:3+4 NIV
Questions and Topics We Discuss:
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What has the Lord taught you about sexual intimacy within marriage?
-
How does sex that happens in the secret place inside our marriage overflow to the rest of our lives, benefitting each arena?
-
What are a few positive messages to replace the negative lies we've previously bought into about sex?
Francie Winslow says Jesus captured her heart at a young age, and she has been on an adventure following Him since then, fueled by a love for His word and His presence.
As a young woman Francie served in Mother Theresa’s home for the dying in Kolkata, sat in brothels with girls trapped in the sex trade of Chang Mai, slept in the bush of Namibia to reach tribal people and orphans with the Gospel of Jesus, visited the homes of the poor in the Dominican Republic, and helped with the rebuilding and development of a village in Sri Lanka after the 2004 tsunami.
For the past few years, Francie has been focused on writing and speaking about God’s good gift of intimacy in marriage. She’s been featured on Christianity Today’s blog and Moody Radio, The Don’t Mom Alone Podcast, and Java with Juli, and several others as she shares about the power of sex in marriage. Most recently, she’s launched a podcast called Heaven in Your Home where she talks all about sex, marriage and the mission of God.
In it all, Francie is passionate about inviting others to experience God’s tangible love that has the ability to transform every area of life.
Francie has a BA in Political Science and a Masters degree in Evangelism and Leadership from Wheaton College in Wheaton, Il. She currently lives in the suburbs of Washington DC with her six kids and husband.
Thank You to Our Sponsor: Leman Property Management Company
Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website
Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
**Transcription**
[00:00:00] <Music>
Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.
[00:00:16] <Music>
Laura Dugger: Leman Property Management Company has the apartment you will be able to call home with over 600 apartment units available in central Illinois. Visit them today at midwestshelters.com or visit them on Facebook.
Today's message is not intended for little ears. We'll be discussing some adult themes, and I want you to be aware before you listen to this message.
Hey, everyone. I'm so excited to share my guest with you today. Francie Winslow has so much to share as it relates to God's vision for sex. She skillfully articulates the benefits of coming together, and she teaches us how the physical act represents a greater spiritual truth. She's going to share how the secret place in our home ripples out to impact our relationships, families, and communities at large. Here's our chat.
Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Francie.
Francie Winslow: Thank you. It's such a blessing to be with you today.
Laura Dugger: [00:01:26] I'm so excited to chat with you. But first, will you just tell us about who you are and what you do?
Francie Winslow: Absolutely. You know, we were actually just talking before you hit record about the fact that I am not a therapist, I'm not a counselor. My heart is really to be an intimacy evangelist because I have encountered intimacy with God and I've realized the power of intimacy within a marriage under His good design and His good plan, and I've realized that both are just precious gifts. One is for this lifetime on earth and one is for eternity, in addition to this lifetime. Both are just incredible gifts worth talking about, worth exploring, worth digging into. So that is my heart.
On top of that, I am a mom of six. So my husband and I have six kiddos here that we're raising in Northern Virginia, just outside of DC. In my extra windows of time, I just find myself overflowing with a passion to communicate God's heart for intimacy, both with Him and within marriage. An integrated view of our bodies and theology behind our bodies and our sexuality has just kind of come as an overflow of what God has been speaking to me and teaching me over the years. So this is kind of what our life looks like. We do some podcasting and some writing, and mostly just a lot of loving my family and normal things and normal life.
Laura Dugger: [00:02:46] I love getting that real-time snapshot. But if you take us back a little while, how did you come to know Jesus and surrender your life to Him?
Francie Winslow: You know, I think it was the kindness of God. He revealed His love to me when I was a really little girl. I was raised in a Christian family and we had just kind of a small-town community that I was blessed enough to be raised in. But even more than going to church all the time, it was how He was meeting me with His love in the little small moments of my day, in my bedroom, playing with my toys. I would just sense that God loves me a lot, and it caused me to just continue to open my heart to Him and continue to seek Him.
I ended up being very moved by pictures and videos I saw of the poor when I was a really little girl, and I told my mom, "I got to be a missionary. Who's going to go to them?" So I got the opportunity to see God's work, not only in my heart, but I started traveling all over the world on mission trips, starting when I was about eighth grade.
And it changed my life so much because I realized that God is not only real in my little bedroom, but He was moving all over the world in powerful ways. And just kind of set the tone for my heart to hunger for Him, for not only myself and knowing that He loves me, but that He is on a worldwide mission to restore and renew all of His creation, and that He's invited me to be a small part of it.
So it's kind of this intimacy worked out from the secret place and rippling out into a vision for what He wants to do on the earth to bring it all back to Him. So it's been a journey many, many years. But I've realized that the more I love Him and the more love I receive from Him and the more I want Him and the more He gives of Himself. And it's this incredible love exchange that's just kept getting sweeter over time.
Laura Dugger: [00:04:30] What is He currently teaching you about theology of our bodies? How did you even develop your own personal theology on that topic?
Francie Winslow: Well, you know, it goes back a bit because the theology of our bodies is very... it sounds kind of lofty and kind of ivory tower, but it really is about the fact that Jesus came in a body and He lived in a body because He wanted to show us the way to be fully human and what it is to be in communion with God and with each other right here, right now in very tangible ways.
What that looked like for me was getting married really young. So I got married when I was about 20. I was at Wheaton College and met my husband and we got married young and ended up going on a mission field for a little while.
But during those really young years, the only thing I had to work with was the idea of don't do it, don't do it, don't do it. And while that worked for me in high school and I realized boundaries are good and they're for my good, I didn't have a theology of sexuality or a theology of my body or theology of sex to apply to a godly marriage. So it was a real big jump for me to go from "don't do it, don't do it" to "you can do it", and how do I switch my thinking on that?
The journey that drew me into was one of inner healing and one of understanding the shame that I had been carrying in my body and that God wanted to meet me there and that my body and things going on with my body, including my gender and my sexuality, were not unrelated to my spiritual life, if that makes sense.
I think for too long I had been kind of like, Your spiritual life is all over here, and then sex or the body or gender is a whole nother conversation that we don't really need to get into. And God was beginning to reintegrate them in our early years of marriage, just renewing my thinking and reclaiming that territory with really His rewriting of the narrative that He made sex, He made it good, He made it for our good, that it relates to the bigger gospel story.
But it began our first year of marriage because it really forced my hand. It brought to the surface we have to talk about this because I can't keep moving forward with this separated way of living and thinking, that, you know, God is over here and all the other stuff is kind of in a different compartment.
Laura Dugger: [00:06:42] In that journey,—I'm just thinking of the newlywed who is listening right now—was this something that started just you and God for that first year, or were you also communicating with your husband as you journeyed to this inner healing?
Francie Winslow: Yeah, it was both. It definitely started with me. I remember specifically sitting on the apartment floor, I had multiple Bible translations out in front of me just searching God's word: how do I love this man? "Oh, Lord, here I am. How do I love this man? You know, we're so different."
You have all of the wish of good feelings, all that dopamine when you're dating, and then you get married and you realize that it's not as easy as it looked in engagement. Issues come up and wounds come up and shame comes up or barriers come up. And we really realized that we had to learn how to fight for each other rather than fighting each other.
For me, it started with this prayer of "how do I love this man"? And God led me to Philippians 2, which I actually have opened right in front of me at the moment. Philippians 2 where Paul's talking to the church: "If any of you want to be like-minded or have the same love of one accord and one mind, let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in loneliness of mind, let you esteem others better than himself and look out for each other's interest, not only for your own."
What God was really showing me was that I long for that oneness of mind, that oneness of heart, that unity. So how do I do it? So it started this conversation of us really trying to honor each other's needs before our own. And I knew that sex was a big need for him, and I was still trying to wrap my mind around it, but it caused me to be willing to be more available and to say yes more often, because I knew that that was a place that was a felt need for him.
What I learned later is that sex is not a man's need and a woman's duty at all, although that was probably informing me at some level back then. What I learned by saying yes to God's design and finding healing is that sex in a marriage is a gift that draws us into deeper intimacy, deeper revelation of God, the God story written on our bodies, and the gospel story written on marriage and also propels us into greater fruitfulness.
But the beginning stages were definitely me seeking God. How do I love this man? Realizing that one key is right there in Philippians 2, understanding what humble love looks like, and then having those conversations of doing that together. That's the ideal.
[00:09:04] We talk a lot about our pink inner healing couch because the first year of our marriage, we had very wise pastors who said, "It looks like you guys might need some inner healing because Jesus came to heal our bodies, but He also came to heal our hearts."
We all have disordered affections and places where we're expecting things from other people that cannot be provided except through God. So we had to figure out what lies are we believing and where were we placing expectations on each other that we should really be looking to God to fill? And where did maybe family of origin things start to hinder our connection and keep us from connecting more intimately and more honestly?
And we would sit on that couch when one of us would get shut down or one of us would get hurt, and we would just invite the Holy Spirit and say, "Holy Spirit, we are so messed up. We're hurting each other. Will you help us? Will you come into this moment and will you heal us? Will you show us what lies we're believing or where we have become disconnected from you or from each other?"
And through one or two honest prayers, God would bring something to mind and make it more clear how we could take a next step towards oneness and a next step towards healing.
And then where that Philippians 2 passage comes in, it was like we were honoring each other in the living room, on the couch, seeing God, and then God was like, "Now come and be one heart, one mind, one body in the bedroom." And it was almost like He was healing us in our hearts, and then He was healing us in our bodies by reframing sex for us. That it's not this fleshy man's need; it is a place for marital unity and intimacy and oneness that can solidify in the physical what we just did in a spiritual on the couch.
And that set the tone for our first year of marriage, which I look back and think, "What a grace! What a supernatural grace!" Because in our brokenness, we very easily were heading towards a lot of wounding, but God intervened and He taught us a way of leaning into Him and leaning into each other.
That produced amazing fruit. And what the fruit was, was the more sex we had, the more prayer we did, the more one we felt, the more grace we had, the more unity we had, the more joy and lightheartedness we had. And then we were also propelled into being able to love other people outside of our home better because we were loving each other better at home.
Laura Dugger: [00:11:14] That is so power-packed with so many truths. Just one more follow-up. As it relates to the theology of body, how do you believe our bodies speak and communicate even when we're not using words?
Francie Winslow: So just to clarify, I did not create theology of the body. It was really coined by a man named Pope John Paul II. From 1979 to 1984, he gave about 129 sermons that are all unpacking this idea that our bodies are a physical revelation of invisible truths. I find evidence of that throughout the entire Bible. And that's what Pope John Paul II... he went from Genesis to Revelation, unpacking this truth that God reveals Himself through creation, primarily as the crown of His creation, our bodies and the gift of marriage and the marriage union and the analogy of marriage.
If you see kind of through the Bible, if you think about God started with the union of a man and a woman, throughout the Old Testament He's pursuing Israel like a bridegroom would pursue a bride. He's calling them His bride. He's saying, "I'm your husband" in Isaiah. And in Hosea, we see Him give the instruction for Joseph to pursue the wayward woman just like God pursues us, because He wants to show and present His heart for union and for this marital intimate love that lasts forever. Then we obviously know that Jesus came and calls Himself a bridegroom, that the church is His bride. And in Revelation, we see that there will be a wedding.
So there is this huge Genesis to Revelation revelation that somehow is easy to miss when we're just caught up in conflict management or contracts and kind of seeing it from an earthly point of view. When we see it from a biblical point of view, we see there is a theology here in marriage, in sexuality, and in our bodies.
One of my favorite quotes from Pope John Paul II says, "The body, in fact, and only the body is capable of making visible what is invisible, the spiritual and the divine." And we see in Romans 1 where it talks about how God... we have no excuse because basically through all that God has created, He has revealed Himself.
So in the beginning, God took His very nature and stamped it on the body of a man and a woman, calling them very good so that we could see glimpses of what He's like in maleness, in femaleness, and especially in the union of those two becoming one. And the result of that is this incredible fruitfulness.
[00:13:46] So there's so much theology that is worth digging into, worth being in awe of, worth giving some thought to, because it brings back the goodness and the rightness and the holiness to this conversation that the world is trying to hijack.
But when you're talking about what does this look like in real life, the reality that our bodies speak, they're constantly made to reveal something. One of the things that I talk to my kids about on a very non-sexual, regular level is our bodies are constantly speaking. They're meant to be places of God revelation. If your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, it's made to be a place where people see God.
And our bodies are basically walking encounters. So people can see God in the kindness of your eyes and in the gentleness of your, you know, a little back pat. If your friend's having a hard time, you can give them a pat on the back, or we can bring cookies to our lonely neighbor with our hands, make them with our hands. And all of those ways our bodies are revealing the love and the tenderness and the compassion of God.
In the marriage bed, if you want to take it a deeper level, when to become one, that's what the marriage promise is, is that I will be one with you forever. So when two bodies become one, it's as if they're telling a bigger story and saying, I recommit myself to you. I love you.
If you roll your eyes conversely at your spouse or give them the cold shoulder, your body is speaking. I'm ignoring you. I don't care about you. I'm shut down. But when you lean in with your body, your words can say, "I'm here with you." But when you lean in with your body and you choose connection through sexual intimacy, your body is speaking something beautiful and powerful, which is, "I'm here. I do. I want to continue to lean in to you. I want to be one with you. I want to celebrate our connection. I want to go deeper."
So in everything we do, because God made us physical, we are constantly communicating. And I think that's one thing that I've learned is that our bodies are powerful communicators. And what is it that my body is communicating to my spouse right now? Am I communicating that I care, that I'm present, and that I want to pursue more depth with him? Or am I communicating, Hey, I'm distracted. I'm on my phone all day, I'm ignoring you, I'm not making eye contact with you? Those things are also communicating.
So I think it's a fascinating look to look practically in our everyday interactions. And then also sexually, our bodies have the ability to communicate powerfully. And that is one of the things that I think has blessed our marriage is to realize how powerful of an opportunity that is to communicate love.
Laura Dugger: [00:16:16] I think that you lay out a great foundation and really have given us a vision for God's view and His vision for sex. Is there anything else specific that the Lord has taught you, Francie, about sexual intimacy within marriage?
Francie Winslow: I think I probably brought into it just a lot of shame and a lot of kind of a difficulty being comfortable in my own skin and feeling confident as a wife. And I think part of that is because of my more conservative background and being maybe a little bit more on the modest side and wanting to walk in freedom with the Lord and my expression of love to Him and wanting to walk in freedom with my husband and my expression of love to him.
I think that's been one of the beautiful gifts that I've realized is that marriage is an incredible journey. One of the things my mentor, Juli Slattery, talks about is that sex is not a destination, it's a journey. And we get to continue to learn.
I think that one of the things that's been comforting to me is that I didn't need to know everything that I know now on our first year of marriage. And what I know now is even a sliver of what I'll know 50 years from now. And I can rejoice in that and I can rejoice in the fact that I always have room to grow as a lover, as a wife.
That it's holy to grow our sex life. That it's an adventure to learn different ways of expressing love together, and that it's an invitation to more intimacy together that actually leads to fruitfulness outside of the bedroom as well.
And seeing that it's all an invitation and not a should, and that it's an opportunity to build something that not only benefits our marriage, but ripples out to impact the culture of our home and ripples out to even our way that we love and serve the world in our careers and our churches and our communities, it just makes me love God's design, and it makes me love the way He created it, and it makes me want to say more yes to God and more yes to my marriage because I'm constantly discovering how good it is and how good He was to give us this gift.
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Laura Dugger: [00:20:00] Jesus transforms us from the inside out. In the same way, you teach what happens in the secret place inside of our marriage overflows to the rest of our lives, and it can benefit our relationships, our parenting, careers, and even the community at large. Will you elaborate on that idea?
Francie Winslow: Totally. I was just kind of alluding to that a little bit. I called it the ripple effect of sex because I think another lie is that sex is just about sex. And you just got to do it and get it done and make your husband happy or, you know, trying to get a baby, trying to conceive or it's kind of like this separated part of our life that is just related to either pleasure or procreation.
What I realized is that in the beginning, the first great commission was given to a husband and wife. God created them, delight in them, blew the breath of life into them, and celebrated their connection by blessing them and telling them, "Be one, be fruitful, multiply, and take dominion together."
And it's that dominion is a place of serving the earth, serving the world, bringing the glory of God into all that He has given us to care for. I feel like that is a powerful vision for marriage. And that's one that we've realized the more intimate we are with God and the more intimate we are with each other in the secret place, the more capacity we have to overflow with life.
On a practical level, I'll say, when Wyatt has a work meeting or when I have a deadline and we are disconnected in our marriage, it feels really hard to be supportive of each other, to be behind each other, to cover each other when there's gaps or weakness. And it just begins to be this grind. There's a lot of conflict. There's a lot of difficulty, a lot of misses, a lot of pain.
[00:21:47] On the converse side, when we have intimacy, when we're pursuing regular connection and going deeper together, there is an overflow of grace and there's an overflow of abundant love for each other that impacts the way we parent together.
Maybe one of our kids is struggling. When Wyatt and I have prioritized oneness and intimacy and we are connected and we're feeling like on the same page, then we are able to parent on the same page and we're able to support each other and back each other up. And then it ripples outside of our home because not only is the atmosphere of our home more peaceful when we are unified and connected, we're able to go to work with more confidence and with more support from each other, which enables us to do better work and to serve people better and enables us to say yes to the ways that God's calling us to serve the church.
Ultimately the whole culture is impacted by the health of the secret place of marriage. Because when marriages are strong and they're thriving and families are thriving, the culture thrives. But when marriages are struggling and our view of sex is warped and there's pain there, families struggle and the culture struggles.
So it is this powerful ripple-out impact that I had no idea sex was related to. But isn't that God's good design? And it is a mirror or a small picture of the bigger intimacy. So you were talking about our intimacy with Jesus. I can't do any good works apart from unity with Jesus. I don't have any good fruit outside of my prayer closet unless I am one with Jesus, unless I am connected to Him. He is my source. He is the lover of my soul. He is the source of all goodness from me.
So the deeper intimacy I have with Jesus, the more fruit I have outside of my little walk with Him and outside of my prayer closet, and outside of my times with Him. But if my intimacy with Him is dry and brittle and empty, I don't have much to give outside. So I just have loved the parallels of those and how true they are.
Laura Dugger: [00:23:40] You sum that up so well because there are some huge truths that you're unpacking. I've been spending a lot of time in the Book of John recently. And so you're talking about being connected to the vine and we can do nothing outside of Him. But then also this secret place, this inside-out transformation that starts in marriage and flows out, that is so biblical to see the fruitfulness that comes. Because of fruitfulness, another word for that is multiplication. And you've taught before that multiplication flows through our families. So I just really appreciate that perspective.
Francie Winslow: So good. Thank you.
Laura Dugger: How do you believe that sex in marriage is a way to fight against Satan and his darkness?
Francie Winslow: Well, I do know that Satan is incredibly jealous of image bearers, and he hates the fact that in the very beginning, before the world was even created, he wanted to be like God. He wanted to be equal to God. And he chose that rebellion and got thrown out of the courts of heaven, and as a result, had had this enmity and this hate for the image bearers of God who God said He made in His likeness. Not that we're equal with God, but that we reflect the goodness of God on this earth He gave us to steward.
So the enemy is constantly trying to destroy and dismantle the image-bearing qualities that we carry and also disengage us from understanding them and seeing them. So, for one, I think just knowing that sex is a gift that bears God's image. It's two becoming one in a way that is so intimate and good that it produces fruitfulness.
We just covered how that shows a mirror picture of our walk with Jesus. That when we are one with Jesus our lives become fruitful. But there's also a power of male and female that the enemy hates. And he wants to dismantle our confidence in what is male and what is female.
And he wants to discourage us and detach us from the connection with our bodies that God called good. Because there's a significance to being male and there's a significant stabbing female independent of marriage, just as image bearers. That we see something beautiful about God in a father and we see something beautiful about God in a mother. And even in the physiological nature of a mother in nursing, what that reveals about God is that He's tender. Because if all of us images Him, we can see God revelation within even the anatomy and physiology of a male and a female body. And God loves that and the enemy hates that.
[00:26:16] So I think when we celebrate our maleness, our femaleness, and in the coming together of two to become one, we really do a good number on the enemy's plans. And we really push back a lot of that confusion by celebrating the good design of God and by celebrating it with our kids and honoring it and always in truth and love, giving glory to God for the good ways He made us, the good ways that help us thrive, the good ways that reveal what He's like.
And I will say that in terms of specific marriage, the enemy wants to bring disunity. He wants to bring division, and He wants to separate what God meant to be one. So leaning in in times of discouragement, in times of depression, even in times where we have been struggling with deep grief and trauma within our family because of many factors, we found that sex is a powerful weapon.
I'll even say just really short. I have a long story about this, but we were trying to discern whether or not it was time for us to adopt and there was a real division happening within our marriage. I actually was super afraid and didn't want to do it and felt like my plate was too much. And it was just clear that the enemy was bringing a ton of division on what was supposed to be a good thing.
So one night we went on a date and realized we were super disconnected and really coming at each other from a bad angle. So we chose to have sex before the date because we know that sex is not just about pleasure or procreation. It's about saying, "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I am one with you."
So we did it before our date thinking, Okay... That's just a little side tip. Sex before dates often make better dates. But before that tense date, we had sex because we realized that sex is also a weapon against disunity. It's a weapon against division. And it's a way that we can fight for unity, which brings the blessing of God. So we went on our date... We actually got more disconnected because things were just really deeply, deeply rooted in where we were coming from.
So we came home and we had sex again because we were putting a stake in the ground saying, Though we are disagreeing, though we're struggling through something, we're not going to let it divide us. We're going to continue in a spirit of unity while we work this out. And I think that was a pretty profound moment for us to say sex is about so many things, and one of the things that is also is a stake in the ground for unity, where the enemy might be trying to tear us apart.
[00:28:30] <Music>
Laura Dugger: I want to take a moment to say thank you. You are the reason our team gets to delight in this work, and we appreciate each of you so very much. If you're benefiting from the lessons learned and applied from The Savvy Sauce, would you take a minute to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts? Five-star ratings and reviews help us reach more people around the globe, and that promotes our goal of sharing joy. So join us in that endeavor with your valuable feedback. Thanks again for being here with us.
[00:29:01] <Music>
Laura Dugger: On the other side then, how is sexual intimacy within marriage one way to sow to the spirit?
Francie Winslow: Well, you know, I think the spirit is about unity and he's about fruitfulness and he's about oneness. So when we celebrate it from a place of honoring God's design, we see an abundance of more of the fruit of the Spirit in our marriage, because we're honoring His design and we're inviting Him into it to lead us. We're not perfect. We haven't figured it all out, but we're saying, God, we're sniffing out something good here and we want you to be a part of it. We want to know you more into it.
I will say that when we prioritize intimacy, we call God thoughts afterwards. I often end up writing after we have sex because I feel like there is something... there's a lot of brain chemicals that are being released throughout the brain that are really profound for bonding and attachment and clarity of thought and reduction of stress and all these cool things that God designed.
But also intimacy has also just launched us into this capacity to partner with the Holy Spirit outside of our bedroom. So I just see it as a way to celebrate God's good design, as a way to lean into intimacy together, and also as a gift that propels us to partner with the Holy Spirit, not only in our marriage but outside of our marriage, too.
Laura Dugger: [00:30:20] And I would love for you to speak to the spouse who may be listening and maybe they're already tired and they're feeling like this is just one more thing to add to my to-do list for the day. What would be your encouragement to reframe that thought into reasons why prioritizing sex with our spouse is so vitally important, even when we don't feel like it right in the moment?
Francie Winslow: Oh, I totally, totally get that. As I mentioned, I have six kids and I'm exhausted most of the time. I will say that we enjoyed the idea of sex drive early intermarriage, where he had a big drive and there was passion. I'm not saying there's not passion now. But there's a different passion because we've been married almost 16 years and it's more the reality of we're both tired.
But we realize the gift that God has given us in sex. So we prioritize it from a different way. I will say that we have both come many nights to the bedroom and say, "Oh, we're so tired, we just want to plop in a bed. But we want connection, so let's switch gears.
And that's one of the things that has been helpful language for me. Instead of just telling my husband, "I'm just way too tired" or "Oh, I have a headache" or "I don't know anybody else touching me. I've been clung to all day by little babies" or "I've been working hard." Instead of straight up just switching out into the no category. I just use this phrase, "Hey, I really want to connect with you. Give me a minute to switch gears."
Because it's just a different gear. It's not an impossibility. I just need to switch gears and I need to have a different frame of thinking because I've just been doing six bedtimes or laundry or cleaning up the kitchen and I'm not in the intimacy mindset, but I can get there. So I often go to my bathroom and I've just developed this little conversation with the Lord when I'm really tired and just say, "Okay, Lord, here I am. Give me your strength, because I want to choose connection."
And I know now that sex is not about the temporary moment of pleasure. It's about building a marriage of oneness and connection. So just like I might not really feel like working out because I'm really tired, I know that it's good for me and it's a healthy choice for me. So on those tired days, sometimes that's what gets me to say yes.
And I always am glad I do it and I never regret it. And you get that chemical brainwash of oxytocin and dopamine and vasopressin. And it's a gift. It is a gift. But sometimes it's harder to get there on some days than others. But I do resonate with that tired mom. But I also have found that leaning in... we talk about that word a lot too. Just lean in. When you're tempted to lean out, lean in. Maybe if you're both so exhausted, it just looks like a really nice, intimate cuddle or maybe, you know, a different kind of connection. But generally speaking, having sex when you don't feel like it can still be great sex, it just has to be an extra intentional step to get there.
Laura Dugger: [00:33:07] I think that's a very mature response because that's when it becomes decision sex rather than drive sex. But the desire can come after that decision is made and that decision for unity.
Francie, I know you and I share such a similar heart of encouragement for marriages. I've noticed that we both want Christian couples to join together more regularly and more freely as they get to experience all of God's good gifts offered within marriage. And a huge part of where this begins is in our minds. So I would love for you now to give us a few positive messages to replace the negative lies we've previously bought into about sex.
Francie Winslow: I think the big thing for me is that sex is not about sex. It's about connection and choosing connection. When we choose to lean in, we realize that it's much richer than a transactional exchange. And when we practice curiosity, God, how did you make our bodies, how did you make this gift of sex, we want more, we realize that there is so much more than the silence of the church and so much more than the perversion of the world.
There is this holy other option that is good and that can be adventurous, that can be deeply meaningful when we look at it in a different light. And I think thinking, okay, sex is not about this act, it's not a man's need, a woman's duty, it's a marriage is a gift. And I want to know more about that gift. I want to find out more about what God was dreaming about when He designed it, when He imparted us with this desire, when He actually made our bodies to fit together like puzzle pieces. There's something wonderful about that.
I also really love the idea of choosing, like you said, the decision over the drive. I think that is really beautiful. Sometimes women feel two ways: either annoyed by their husband's drive. Like, Oh, he wants me all the time. Re-seeing that.
[00:35:07] I had a woman who's been married 33 years reach out to me. It was so precious. She's in her gray hair years. And she said, "Francie, I listen to your podcast and now I realize that when my husband says, "Hey babe, it's late, I know, but I really want to have sex with you, instead of being annoyed by him, I hear him say he desires me, he wants connection with me. And that's his way of reaching out." So she started celebrating it more, less as a burden, but seeing his drive as an invitation to connection.
The other side is that a lot of women will tell me, Hey, I have a higher drive than my husband. And I think whoever has the higher drive learning that it's not about drive and echoing you again, it's about decision, it's about connection. And knowing that if you do have the higher drive, you can be playful and you can initiate and you can celebrate that.
But drives do one thing. They drive us together and that's worth celebrating. Drives come and go. Drives change with the season and the hormones and the amount of kids or whatever stage you're in. But just knowing that there's a bigger picture at play and that it's worth leaning into and worth choosing connection for.
Laura Dugger: [00:36:10] Those are good truths. I just also want to highlight one other that I've heard you share on your podcast before. You posed the question, Do we really want exhaustion to dominate our marriage and our lives? And you went on just to encourage that that heaven on earth connection is possible when we trust God's design over our current emotions or exhaustion.
Francie Winslow: Yeah, well summarized. I think that's true. I think our exhaustion and our emotions are fleeting, but God's design is eternal. He imprinted his design on this gift of marriage to show us something bigger. So when we're ruled and tossed by our present emotions, we miss out on the bigger eternal picture that's being revealed through the gift of married sex.
Laura Dugger: Well, and I always appreciate having a safe place to recommend people to go after this conversation so that they can get further educated about sex within a biblical worldview. I think you do such an incredible job of that. So would you like to share where you could direct listeners to learn more from you?
Francie Winslow: Absolutely. I have a podcast called The Heaven in Your Home Podcast. With that being the prayer that we would encounter God, His presence, His rule and reign, His Kingdom of Heaven in every room of our home, reordering our hearts and our desires so that we see His good gifts on sex marriage and His mission through it all.
So the podcast is a great place. I would start closer to the beginning of the podcast. Episode 1, 2, you hear a bit of my story, my background, and then I really build on these ideas that I have gleaned and learned and experienced. I would just be so honored to have any listeners join me there.
This summer, actually in June, I'm launching a discipleship circle, a Heaven in Your Home discipleship circle. So if anybody wants to take the content and really go deeper and have a little bit more access to me through Q&A and a few other deeper resources, you're welcome to join me there as well. That information is on my website, franciewinslow.com.
Laura Dugger: [00:38:08] Wonderful. We will make sure it's easily accessible in our show notes today. You know we're called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge or discernment. So as my final question for you, Francie, what is your savvy sauce?
Francie Winslow: Okay. This is going to be just a fun tip. So in our season of complete exhaustion, just to be real, six little kids, we have found that significant and quality sexual connection is really hard. So we might have a few touch points throughout the week, but we have really realized the fun gift of half-day rates at the local hotel, whatever that is.
You can find cheaper rates on hotwired.com or Priceline and finding the cheapest rate we can at a hotel. And instead of spending money on dinner in a movie, we spend money on a hotel room. And we'll go from like 4 p.m. to 10 p.m. and have a time where we're intimate together. We could take a nap. We could watch a movie. We can have conversation. And it's like a reboot.
So that's my little tip, my savvy sauce is don't overlook the potential for a marriage getaway right in your little town or your city that costs almost as much as dinner in a movie. And it can really be a great marriage reboot for your intimacy. We do it pretty regularly. So that's been a really sweet tip that I'd love to pass on.
Laura Dugger: [00:39:33] I love it. You are the first one on the savvy sauce to respond that way. That is so clever. Francie, there is just such an obvious and apparent anointing from the Lord on this message and what He's been teaching you. And I'm so grateful that you've compacted what you've learned in 16 years and offered it to all of us. It has been such a gift to spend time with you today and I would love to invite you back next week as well.
Francie Winslow: Awesome. Well, I look forward to joining you. Thank you so much. What a gift!
Laura Dugger: [00:40:06] One more thing before you go, have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners and God is perfect and holy, so He cannot be in the presence of sin. Therefore, we're separated from Him.
This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute.
This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus.
We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
So would you pray with me now? Heavenly, Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change their lives now for eternity. In Jesus name, we pray, amen.
If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him, you get the opportunity to live your life for Him.
[00:42:04] At this podcast, we are called Savvy for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So are you ready to get started?
First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision my parents took me to Barnes and Noble to get the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. Start by reading the book of John.
Get connected locally, which basically means just tell someone who is part of the church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.
We want to celebrate with you too. So feel free to leave a comment for us if you made a decision for Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process.
Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.
If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
Monday Sep 20, 2021
Monday Sep 20, 2021
154. Flourishing in All Seasons with Dr. Catherine Hart Weber
John 15:16 AMP "You have not chosen Me, but I have chosen you and I have appointed and placed and purposefully planted you, so that you would go and bear fruit and keep on bearing, and that your fruit will remain and be lasting, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name [as My representative] He may give to you."
Questions and Topics We Discuss:
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How can we cultivate healthy lifestyles that promote lasting fruitfulness?
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What are healthy ways to support our brain health?
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Are there any questions you recommend we process in hopes of improving our connection with God, others and ourselves?
Dr. Catherine Hart Weber is blessed to live around the corner from a beautiful foothill monastery where she enjoys companioning others in counseling, life coaching, spiritual formation and restorative retreats.
As a Benedictine Oblate, she invites others to join the journey of seeking God, following Jesus and loving others well, with the intention of practicing whole person balanced lifestyle rhythms based on a rule of life.
She received a Ph.D. and Master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Fuller Theological Seminary School of Psychology, a Master’s degree in Theology and Spiritual Formation from Fuller Theological Seminary and a Bachelors of Arts in Psychology and Kinesiology from UCLA.
Dr. Weber is grateful to have a husband, two adult daughters, a son-in-law, and an adorable grand son and grand daughter.
She is most restored from experiencing God when she is out walking in the beauty of nature, through botanical gardens, at the beach or exploring sacred spaces. She enjoys inspirational reading, sharing deeply with spiritual companions and playing with food in the kitchen.
Flourish Center for Well-Being
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Flourish by Dr. Catherine Hart Weber
The Digital Invasion by Dr. Sylvia Hart Frejd
Thank You to Our Sponsor: WinShape Marriage
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Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Monday Sep 13, 2021
Monday Sep 13, 2021
153. Nine Ways to Connect with God with Gary Thomas
“So then, let us pursue [with enthusiasm] the things which make for peace and the building up of one another [things which lead to spiritual growth].”
Romans 14:19 (AMP)
Questions We Discuss:
1. Will you teach us what each of these nine spiritual temperaments are?
2. How can each of us identify our primary pathway?
3. What benefits come from identifying our own pathway and the pathway of others?
Gary Thomas’ writing and speaking focuses on bringing people closer to Christ and closer to others. He is the author of 20 books that together have sold over two million copies and have been translated into more than a dozen languages. These books include When to Walk Away: Finding Freedom from Toxic People; Sacred Marriage: What if God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?, The Sacred Search: What If It’s Not About Who You Marry, but Why?, and the Gold Medallion award winner Authentic Faith.
Gary holds a B.A. in English Literature from Western Washington University, an MA degree in systematic theology from Regent College (Vancouver, BC), and an honorary Doctor of Divinity degree from Western Seminary (Portland, OR).
He serves on the teaching team (and as Writer in Residence) at Second Baptist Church, Houston—a congregation with six campuses and 70,000 members—and is an adjunct faculty member at Western Seminary in Portland, Oregon and Houston Theological Seminary in Houston, Texas.
Gary’s speaking ministry has led him to speak in 49 states and nine different countries, and on numerous national television and radio programs, including multiple appearances on Focus on the Family and Family Life Today. Gary’s interviews on Focus on the Family have been chosen among the “Best of 2013,” “Best of 2014” and “Best of 2017.”
Gary enjoys running in his spare time and has completed 14 marathons, including the Boston Marathon three times. He and his wife Lisa have been married for 35 years and they have three adult children and the smartest, cutest, most adorable granddaughter on the planet.
Gary is active online through his website (www.garythomas.com), twitter (@garyLthomas) Facebook (www.facebook.com/authorgarythomas) and Instagram (@garythomasbooks)
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Sacred Pathways: Nine Ways to Connect with God
Thank You to Our Sponsor: WinShape Marriage
Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Monday Sep 06, 2021
Monday Sep 06, 2021
152. Five Keys to Creating Customer Loyalty in Your Business with Elizabeth Dixon
"Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:10b (NIV)
Questions and Topics We Discuss:
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Why is it vitally important to improve our customer experience, whether we are a mom-preneur, small business owner, or corporate employee?
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What are the five elements for exceptional customer experience?
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How do we actually do these?
Elizabeth Dixon’s most valuable roles are wife to her best friend, John, and mom to her 7 year old son, David, and 6 year old daughter, Ansley.
With her talents as a business leader, strategist and speaker, Elizabeth currently leads Service & Hospitality strategy for Chick-fil-A, speaks across the country on topics of personal and business development, and she has founded, operated and sold several small businesses as well as actively coaches emerging entrepreneurs toward success in achieving their business goals.
Elizabeth has a B.S. from Liberty University and certifications in strategy and leadership from Emory University and Harvard University.
She is a student of cooking, an aspiring composter, a want to be gardener, a vigorous reader, an average backyard soccer player and an adventure enthusiast.
Connect with Elizabeth on LinkedIn or Instagram @elizabethdixonspeaks
Thank You to Our Sponsor: Midwest Food Bank
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Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Monday Aug 30, 2021
Monday Aug 30, 2021
*Disclaimer* This episode includes mature content and is not intended for children.
151. Discovering God's Design for Romance with Sharon Jaynes
Song of Solomon 5:16 (AMP) “His mouth is full of sweetness; Yes, he is altogether lovely and desirable. This is my beloved and this is my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem."
Questions and Topics We Discuss:
-
What did you discover through your research in Song of Solomon?
-
From Song of Solomon, what did you learn about female desire that is potentially different from our typical cultural assumptions?
-
How can we remain lovestruck in our marriages?
Sharon Jaynes is a conference speaker and the author of twenty-five books. She served as vice president and radio cohost of Proverbs 31 Ministries for ten years and currently writes for their online devotions. Sharon is cofounder of Girlfriends in God, which strives to cross generational, racial, and denominational boundaries to bring the body of Christ together as believers. She and her husband live in Weddington, North Carolina.
Connect with Sharon on Facebook, Instagram, or Her Website
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Other Episodes About Sexual Intimacy in Marriage:
8 Hope for Treating Pelvic Pain With Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist Specialist, Tracey LeGrand
30 Treatment for Sexual Issues with Certified Sex Therapist, Emma Schmidt
34 Talking With Your Kids About Sex with Brian and Alison Sutter
39 Natural Aphrodisiacs in Marriage with Certified Sex Therapist, Dr. Douglas Rosenau
80 Hormones and Body Image with Vickie George
89 Passion Pursuit with Dr. Juli Slattery
94 Erectile Dysfunction, Premature Ejaculation, and Treatments with Dr. Irwin Goldstein
95 Bonus Episode: Female Orgasm with Sue Goldstein
101 Turn Ons, Turn Offs, and Savoring Sex in Marriage with Dr. Jennifer Konzen
104 Sexual Desire Discrepancy in Marriage with Dr. Michael Sytsma
106 Answering Listeners Questions about Sex with Kelli Willard
108 Anatomy of an Affair with Dave Carder
Thank You to Our Sponsor: Sam Leman Eureka
Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website
Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Monday Aug 23, 2021
Monday Aug 23, 2021
150. Brain Science and Spiritual Abundance with Ken Baugh
Romans 12:2 (AMP) And do not be conformed to this world [any longer with its superficial values and customs], but be transformed and progressively changed [as you mature spiritually] by the renewing of your mind [focusing on godly values and ethical attitudes], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His plan and purpose for you].
**Transcription Below**
Questions and Topics We Discuss:
- How can we experience the abundant life here and now?
- How does meditating on Scripture help rewire our brains?
- What are the 4 forces that most heavily influence the way we think about things?
Ken Baugh was a successful pastor before a crippling experience of burnout disrupted his career and set him on a journey to better understand the dynamics of spiritual health. With a DM in from Talbot Theological Seminary, Ken is the founder and CEO of IDT Ministries.
IDT Ministries Discipleship Website
Pastor Ken Baugh's YouTube Channel
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Unhindered Abundance by Ken Baugh
Thank You to Our Sponsor: WinShape Marriage
Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website
Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
**Transcription**
[00:00:00] <music>
Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.
[00:00:19] <music>
Laura Dugger: I am thrilled to introduce you to our sponsor, Winshape Marriage. Their weekend retreats will strengthen your marriage, and you will enjoy this gorgeous setting, delicious food, and quality time with your spouse. To find out more, visit them online at Winshapemarriage.org. That's Winshapemarriage.org. Thanks for your sponsorship.
Ken Baugh is my guest today. He is humble, knowledgeable, and gentle in his delivery. We're going to cover topics such as the abundant life in Christ, relationship with the Holy Spirit, and even practical ways to rewire our brains. He's also going to share what the one thing is that we have control over that can impact our entire spiritual life.
Here's our chat.
Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Ken. [00:01:19]
Ken Baugh: Thank you, Laura. It's so great to be with you today.
Laura Dugger: Will you just start by sharing a bit about who you are and what you do?
Ken Baugh: Well, I've been a follower of Christ for 46 years, married to Susan, the love of my life, for 35 years. We have two adult daughters, three grandchildren, and a dog named Ro.
I was a local church pastor for 25 years. Ten and a half of those years, I was a senior pastor of a large church in Southern California. In 2014, I launched IDT Ministries, where we offer coaching and resources to help people become more spiritually and emotionally healthy. I'm also a visiting professor at Tabor College, teaching in the Master of Education program in neuroscience and trauma.
Laura Dugger: Wow, that's quite the resume. With your rich background in theology, I'm just excited to hear a lot of different theological concepts from you today. [00:02:20] So could you just begin by defining the abundant life and share how we can actually experience that here and now?
Ken Baugh: That word "abundance" that Jesus uses in John 10:10, I think it's more about quality than quantity. So the more we take on the character of Christ, which is what it means to be conformed to his image, Paul talks about that in 2 Corinthians 3:18 and Romans 8:29 as a couple of places. But the more we conform to that image of Christ, we will experience the quality of life that Jesus Himself experienced while on earth.
Maybe the word "Shalom" would be helpful in understanding what Jesus was getting at when he referred to the abundant life. Shalom is a Hebrew word that refers to an inner state of completeness or wholeness and tranquility. If you've ever been to Israel and someone says Shalom, they would be saying something like, may your life be full of well-being. [00:03:21]
I think Shalom captures the concept of the abundant life. And all of this is only accessible through our relationship with Christ. And I don't think that any of us are going to experience the full extent of the abundant life that is available to us in this life but I think we can maybe experience a lot more of it than we ever thought possible.
Laura Dugger: And for some people, I've heard this term "worm theology" thrown around before. So could you maybe elaborate on what that would be and why that misses the heart of this scripture?
Ken Baugh: Worm theology is the idea that "I'm nobody. I'm just scum. I'm a dirty, rotten sinner." It really is mired in guilt, shame, and condemnation of which in Christ there is none of that. So we are a new creation in Christ. We are beloved children of our heavenly Father. [00:04:23] We are those in whom He both delights and in whom He dwells. So the idea that I'm some dirty, rotten, scummy person just doesn't stand up biblically as a new creation in Christ.
Laura Dugger: I appreciate so many things about your recent book, Unhindered Abundance. But even on this topic, you were explaining how God uses the Bible and He identifies us as saints. That's what He calls us. That's what He refers to us as after we've had that moment of transformation, justification, when we surrender our life to Him.
You just succinctly articulated something so well that I just want to repeat. I'm not going to quote it verbatim. But you talk about before that decision, we may sin and after that decision, we may still sin, we will still sin. [00:05:25] But the difference is before that choice we're enslaved to sin, and now we have the power to choose not to sin. We can overcome that because of Jesus. Would you add anything to that?
Ken Baugh: Yeah, I think that's really an important topic to understand, Laura. Because a lot of Christians, I think, do struggle with the fact that, well, gosh, if I am a new creation in Christ, why do I still struggle with anger or why am I still stuck in addiction or what is going on? The idea that is if these things are still true in my life, then this must not be true, that I am a child of God, that I am a new creation in Christ.
I think what we need to all remember and maybe remind each other of is that God doesn't hit the "clear" button on our life when we get saved. All of the past narrative that is part of our story, all of those memories, all of the pain and trauma, it's all still there. [00:06:23]
The brain has the capacity to store every experience, everything that's ever happened to you and to me all in one place. So it's easy to stay stuck in former both habits and thinking patterns that are destructive and playing out in our current day.
Laura Dugger: On the contrary of this abundant life that you had been explaining, how do you also see the enemy of our souls scheming to keep us stuck in living a mediocre life?
Ken Baugh: Well, it's interesting. I mean, that's a great question. It's interesting when you go back to John 10:10, that in the context of Jesus saying that He came to give life abundantly, right before that He said the thief comes only to kill, steal and destroy, but I have come that they may have life and have it abundantly. So right there embedded in our understanding of the abundant life is there is a thief that is trying to take that away. [00:07:22]
Now, Satan has no power over us in Christ, but he can tempt us to believe lies and distortions of the truth about who God is, who we are, other people as well, that will really act as barriers to experiencing the abundant life that is actually available to us.
Laura Dugger: In Christian circles, I know that the written word is lifted high, and rightfully so, but I don't want us to miss the living word. Will you tell us a little bit more about the "living word"?
Ken Baugh: Yeah, I like to say that the written word is always pointing us to the living word, who is Jesus. John 1:1, the word became flesh and dwelt among us. And knowing God's word is essential. But it should always be pointing us into a deeper knowledge of who God is and who we are and the relationship that has been made available to us in Christ. [00:08:22]
God is a relational being. He's existed for all eternity in the triune community of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. So the written word should contribute to the quality of our relationship with the living word.
This is what didn't happen with the Pharisees. They knew the written word backwards and forwards, but it had no effect on their hearts. It wasn't a catalyst for a quality of change in their relationship with God.
That's what I think we all need to be careful of that we don't miss. Because biblical truth is essential to our growth in Christ, but knowing God involves more than just knowing facts about God. You can actually know a lot of facts about God, but not really know God. And I think that that's an important distinction.
In fact, in Ephesians 3.19, the apostle Paul refers to knowing the love of God in a way that surpasses knowledge. [00:09:23] And that might sound odd. It's like, well, how do we do that? Well, it's through relationship.
So we have a relationship with a risen, live Savior. And the opportunity for us to experience relationship with him is similar to any other relationship we would have with another living being. So it's just quite extraordinary what is actually possible for us and how the written word can contribute to the growth in our understanding of who God is and the quality of our relationship with God.
Laura Dugger: I learn so much through examples. So could you even give some examples from your own life or from your wife Susan's life of how you interact with the living word and what that relationship looks like for you?
Ken Baugh: Oh, gosh, so many different ways. One of the things is just memorizing and meditating on scripture and how that is so transformative in just the neural pathways in our brain and how it is so helpful in basically rewiring our brain and so forth. [00:10:33]
Susan and I have spent a lot of time memorizing scripture and letting that memorization process give us the ability to really meditate on the truth of God's word kind of 24-7. When we train ourselves to become aware of God's presence all around us and that He is loving us in so many different ways, but we're just not dialed into that frequency to understanding...
In fact, I just had a coaching meeting with one of my clients and we were talking about something very similar to this. And I said, "I want you to go about your next week and go into each day and before you leave the house, ask the Lord to reveal to you five or ten different ways that He loves you just throughout the course of your day. So I want you to kind of put those glasses on. And so when things come up throughout the day, maybe you see something that's beautiful or you have a conversation with somebody that you didn't expect or a situation takes place, I want you to internalize that situation as a way of God expressing His love for you." [00:11:46] And he's like, "Wow, that's really cool." So I'm actually anxious to see the next time we meet how that plays out. So there's a lot of different ways you can have fun with this and it can be super practical.
Laura Dugger: Well, speaking of practicality, what are some practical ways we can cultivate an awareness of the Holy Spirit amid all the distractions we may be facing?
Ken Baugh: I think, Laura, we have to be really intentional about that because we are so busy and are consumed with so many distractions, whether it's social media, television, radio, podcasts, right? I mean, everything that can be used for good can also be used for bad to keep us distracted from really kind of dialing into God's frequency.
I think some practical ways of doing that is dialing in, is making time, regular time, whether it's in our day or certainly in our week where we are spending time alone with God. [00:12:47] Whether that be a time of silence or solitude, maybe you go for a walk in your neighborhood or on the beach, for us, or whatever and just kind of in a sense picture Jesus right there walking with you. Because He is right there with you. You just don't have the eyes to see it. But we know through the eyes of faith that He is always with us.
I think, again, it's just recognizing – and I think creation, I think the world around us can be a great helper in that. I mean Paul in Romans 1:20 says that God's invisible qualities and eternal power and divine nature have been clearly seen being understood from what has been made. So God's fingerprints are all over creation, and if we take the time to pay attention to it, then I think we're going to see things that we would completely miss otherwise.
If you're driving down the freeway at 65 miles an hour and there's a flower on the side of the road, chances are you're not going to see that flower. [00:13:47] But if you're driving at two miles an hour or you're standing still and you look out and that flower is there, you're going to see it. I just think we miss things all the time where God is like, Hey, Laura, I want you to know I love you. Here's a... oh, darn, she missed it. Okay, let's do another one." You know?
I just think that's the way God sees us. When we start dialing into that reality that that's how he sees us, man, it's going to have a radical impact on how we think and our quality of life.
Laura Dugger: Such a helpful word picture. Even today, this is a very common occurrence in parenting. I will feel helpless or clueless at different times. We have four young daughters. Even today, just talking with Jesus through my prayer life while I'm with the children and trying to discern what to do next, I was just reminded I'm so grateful that He is always here. He is always available. [00:14:47]
Ken Baugh: Yeah, absolutely.
Laura Dugger: Let's take a quick break to hear a message from our sponsor.
Sponsor: I'm so excited to share today's sponsor, Winshape Marriage, with you. Winshape Marriage is a fantastic ministry that helps couples prepare, strengthen, and if needed, even save their marriage.
Winshape Marriage is grounded on the belief that the strongest marriages are the ones that are nurtured, even if it seems like things are going smoothly. That way, they'll be stronger if they do hit a bump along their marital journey.
Through their weekend retreats, Winshape Marriage invites couples to enjoy time away to simply focus on each other. These weekend retreats are hosted within the beautiful refuge of Winshape Retreat, perched in the mountains of Rome, Georgia, which is just a short drive from Atlanta, Birmingham, and Chattanooga.
While you and your spouse are there, you'll be well-fed, well-nurtured, and well-cared for. During your time away in this beautiful place, you and your spouse will learn from expert speakers and explore topics related to intimacy, overcoming challenges, improving communication, and so much more. [00:15:50]
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To find an experience that's right for you and your spouse, head to their website, WinshapeMarriage.org. That's WinshapeMarriage.org. Thanks for your sponsorship.
Laura Dugger: On a different topic, Ken, when did you become interested in the intersection of brain science and spiritual formation?
Ken Baugh: That might be kind of counterintuitive. It's like, how can brain science inform me in my discipleship with Jesus or my relationship with God? When I was doing research for my dissertation, I discovered that many Christians – and this came out of my 25 years of pastoral ministry as well – just feel stuck in their faith and are very disillusioned.
People who love Jesus, who have walked with Him for years, have read their Bible and prayed and served and given generously, and worship in church with other believers find themselves stuck in a myriad of addictions and experiencing a host of emotional problems. [00:17:01] It wasn't for lack of information or sincerity on these people's part.
One of the primary reasons I came to discover all of this is that when you go back to scripture, you will find so much evidence of what we think about and how it affects us over and over and over again. You find that. I'll just give you a couple of examples.
Romans 12:2: Be transformed by the renewal of your mind. Second Corinthians 10:5: Take every thought captive to obey Christ. Ephesians 4:21-24. Let the spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Philippians 4:8: Whatever is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Colossians 3:2: Set your minds on things above non-earthly. I mean I could go on and on and on.
As I was doing my research as to what is it that is keeping people stuck, it's too easy to just say, well, it's sin. [00:18:04] Well, of course it is sin, but that's not helpful. We have to get more specific than that.
And then as I started looking at how that gets repaired, how hurt is resolved that is keeping us stuck and maybe causing us to act out in ways that are sinful or hurtful, I kept bringing that knowledge back to Scripture and seeing this overwhelming evidence of how important our thought life is. And then when I started pairing that up together, I started seeing things that were like, wow, this is very consistent.
So this whole idea of Christ's formation, this model of discipleship that I feel like I've kind of stumbled into is really built on a robust biblical theology but is infused with findings from both psychology and neurology. When we look at kind of this holistic perspective and how God created us and how He created our brains to work, it starts giving us insight into things as to why we might not be experiencing the abundant life that is available to us. [00:19:08]
Laura Dugger: Yes! Just to elaborate on that further, I have your book open to page 85 and I'll just read a couple sentences. But you're talking about the brain and you say that "neurons are birthed by thoughts. The more you think about something, the more neurons are developed around that thought and the stronger and more influential that thought becomes. Remember, thoughts stimulate emotions, emotions affect decisions, and all these gears turning together drive behavior. This is why most of what we do can be traced back to thinking patterns."
From your study, can you just share a little bit more about your findings around that topic?
Ken Baugh: Yeah. When you look at how God created human beings, and I'm going to be overly simplistic just for illustration purposes, God created us as material beings. So we have a physical body and he created us with an immaterial part, which is the Bible refers to in a number of different ways. [00:20:12] Those would include spirit, mind, inner being.
The most common word used in scripture to refer to that immaterial self is "heart". Then when you dive into understanding the heart, both Old and New Testament, you find a consistent thread that there's three primary dynamics of the heart, thought, emotion, and will.
I kind of liken them to gears in a car's transmission. When one gear turns, right, when you're thinking gear turns, let's say it's going to turn the gear of your emotions, that's going to turn the gear of your will, that's then going to promote behavior.
So we can see why Jesus focused so much of his teaching on the heart. You can see why Solomon in Proverbs 4:23 says to guard your heart for it's the wellspring of life, that there's this overwhelming, again, evidence throughout scripture of our heart. [00:21:13]
And the reason is, is because what you think about is going to affect how you feel, which is going to affect your will, your desires, that then are going to influence behavior. So behavior is always a matter of the heart.
You can always resolve behavior, not by stopping the behavior. That's not what you focus your attention on. You focus on what's going on in the heart that is producing the behavior. When we start exploring that, we start realizing more and more that the only thing that we can control directly is our thought life. We can choose what we're going to think about. We are not slaves to our thoughts. You can't control your emotions directly, but you can control them indirectly by what you choose to think about.
It is true that you can control your will to a certain extent. But you and I both know that willpower is only sustainable for so long. Just think about the last New Year's resolution you made, right? [00:22:13] So we don't need to directly be able to control those other things. If we control just our thoughts, that is then going to affect our emotions, our will, that are then going to play out in our behavior.
Now, there's other things that drive behavior too that we don't think about that are pre-conscious or non-conscious. But the predominantly important dynamic of the heart that is referred to overwhelmingly in scripture is what we think about.
Laura Dugger: I think that was one of my biggest takeaways from your book. It was so empowering and spirit-led because it's from the Bible. But just that encouragement, that meditating on the word and getting the right thoughts in our brain, that will affect everything and really lead us into the abundant life in Christ.
Ken Baugh: Yeah. And Laura, let me just back up on something you mentioned earlier. The section that you read out of the book is really important to understand because the more we think about something over and over and over again, those neurons – neurons are just the brain cells that emit electrical signals. [00:23:20] And the more you think a thought, that thought creates this current, if you will, that creates other neurons.
So you can actually create matter, which a neuron is a particle, right, it's matter, you can create matter by what you choose to think about. So the more you think about something, those neurons are firing together and they're building a stronger connection between those other neurons so that that particular thought over time and repetition becomes the dominant way you're going to think about something.
It's not unlike if your parents bought a little cabin at the lake when you were a kid and it was an old cabin and it had been abandoned for a while and you guys are fixing it up and there's no real path to get down to the dock where the water is.
So the first time you go down there, you got to kind of go through the brush and maybe cut some stuff out and so forth. But the more often you walk that path over time, over and over and over again, you create a path that then gets you to the dock quickly. [00:24:27]
In a similar way, that's how our thinking plays itself out. The more you think about something over, whether it's positive or negative, the more likely that becomes the dominant way of thinking that's going to affect how you feel. It's going to affect your will. That's going to affect your behavior.
Laura Dugger: It's just so fascinating and leaves me in awe of our creator to think about all of that and the possibilities with neuroplasticity and the grace that's available.
Something we love to share at The Savvy Sauce is joy. If you want to share joy too, will you take a moment and share this episode or any of your previous favorites with a friend? You can post it on social media and tag us at The Savvy Sauce. You could text it to a friend who could use specific encouragement on one of the topics that we've covered. Or you could email articles to loved ones that you read on TheSavvySauce.com under our "Articles" tab. Whichever route you choose, we invite you to share joy along with us. [00:25:29]
How does meditating on scripture help rewire our brains?
Ken Baugh: That's such a great question. Remember what we've talked about, that the more you think about a thought, the more neurons are created around that thought and the stronger that thought becomes. So if you are worrying about something and you're thinking about worst-case scenarios, you're thinking catastrophically or whatever, that worry is going to dominate your thinking. It's going to create emotions that are going to create anxiety that's going to have a negative effect.
Well, the opposite is true as well. If you're meditating on scripture, you're meditating on the truth of God's word, what God says is true, you're creating new neural pathways based on the repetition of the memorization process and the meditation process, that you're going over it and over it and over it and over it. And that's then going to produce healthy emotions that are going to influence your will and desires in a way that are then going to be worked out much differently in your behavior than the other negative dynamics. [00:26:39] Does that help?
Laura Dugger: Yes, that's super helpful. Just thinking, we focused on this spiritual discipline of scripture memorization, but what are some of the other spiritual disciplines that you would recommend, especially for someone maybe who's never heard that term before?
Ken Baugh: Think of spiritual disciplines as exercises, spiritual exercises. Some people get nervous when you start talking about, well, wait a second here, I didn't think that I was supposed to do anything. I thought that grace is about unmerited favor and all that. And of course, grace is.
Dallas Willard reminded us that grace is opposed to earning. It's not opposed to effort. There is lots of biblical evidence that we are essentially partnering with the Holy Spirit in our own Christ formation. There are a number of aspects of salvation that we play no part in, right? Regeneration — that's the work of the spirit of God. [00:27:40] Justification — you mentioned early on in the podcast — that's an act of God alone. Glorification is an act of God alone. But there's a dynamic in our sanctification, which is progressive, meaning it's ongoing. That's the only part in our salvation that we actually participate in.
And so where do you find that in scripture? Well, goodness, it's everywhere. I'll just give you a couple examples, and it's in my book on page 153. Walk by the spirit. Let us also keep in step with the spirit. It takes effort on our part to walk in the spirit, right?
Ephesians 5:18, Be filled with the spirit. That's a direct command. That's an imperative in the Greek. Ephesians 4:22, Put off your old self. Be renewed in the spirit of your minds. Philippians 2:12, Work out your salvation with fear and trembling.
That Philippians 2 verse is really important because Paul is saying work out your salvation, not work for your salvation. [00:28:43] Our salvation that we have in Christ, our justification, regeneration is taken care of at the cross. That's the gift of salvation, the gift of grace given to us that we don't deserve, right? That's all based on God's grace, His love, and so forth. But the growth process after salvation is what we get to participate in.
Think about a farmer. A farmer can't make the crop grow, but he can plow the soil, plant the seed, water the seed, fertilize the seed. Essentially, he can create the environment where growth will take place.
In a similar way, we have the ability to do certain things that then the Holy Spirit takes and produces growth from. For example, Scripture is part of our spiritual growth exercise program, if you will. And yet the Spirit of God doesn't do the reading for us. We have to exert the effort to sit down, open our Bibles, and start to read. [00:29:45] The Spirit then uses the word to bring about awareness, to bring about understanding, because part of His role is to guide us into all truth. And so He does the growing part, but we get to participate in some of the action of that. So it's a partnership. It's a limited partnership, but it's still a partnership.
Laura Dugger: I think that's really exciting that we're invited into that process and we get to participate. Going back to something you had talked about earlier, as we're looking at the way we think and what thoughts we're filling our minds with, you also write about there are four forces. That most heavily influence the way we think about things. Can you share what those four forces are and why that even matters?
Ken Baugh: Yeah. There's a lot of things, Laura, that really do affect why we think the way we do and so forth. But there's four kind of big ones that I think create important categories. [00:30:47] One is our family of origin. The second is our culture that we were raised in, our ethnicity. Painful life experiences is also a huge shaping factor as well as any kind of church background or church experiences. These really affect our perception of ourself, our perception of God, our perception of others.
Let's just take culture and ethnicity, for example. A woman raised in the Middle East is going to have a very different experience culturally than a woman who's raised in the West. Even in America, there's quite cultural differences between the Pacific Northwest and California, for example. Or you go into the South, right? I have friends that live in the deep South, in Louisiana. My dad's family is from Arkansas. That's a very different culture. We lived in Washington, D.C. for ten and a half years and that's a very different culture. If you go to Maine or Connecticut, that's different.
So all of those cultural dynamics are going to have an effect on us. [00:31:48] Your church experience will have an effect on you as well. What that church teaches about God and how they understand scripture. So if you're raised in that, that's going to be a primary lens that you look through to understand what is true, what is real.
I think one of the things that is really important for all of us to remember is that we read scripture through our own filters. The scripture itself is the inerrant word of God. But my ability to understand the inerrant word of God is always going to be seen through various filters of how my heart has been shaped to see and to know God. And so I think we just have to really come to scripture humbly.
It's not that we can't understand the truth of scripture, but we have to realize that we're going to have our own prejudices and biases. And that's where we really need the work of the spirit in our lives to help guide us into what is true.
Laura Dugger: Well, that is really helpful, Ken, to get to hear what does impact the way that we think about things. [00:32:51] But then if someone recognizes those four things, what can they begin to do about that to maybe correct some false beliefs and grow more in truth?
Ken Baugh: I think you really hit it, is that we have to be students of the word to know what God says is true, because what He says is true is true. Whether I believe it or not, it's the truth. We have the spirit of God dwelling in us and we have also, as Paul reminds us, has been given the mind of Christ. So we have the capacity to understand what is true. But it's helpful if we can identify where some of those misperceptions or distortions have come from.
For example, let's say you were raised in a church where God was promoted as being very stern and stoic maybe, constantly angry. And so the culture was fear and that the motivation for the fear was to get you to behave. [00:33:53] Well, that's going to have a radical effect on your perception of God. That's going to really determine whether you move toward God or away from God.
But as you start reading Scripture, you start saying, well, wait a second. God defines Himself as loving and compassionate, long-suffering, that He is a heavenly Father, a good heavenly Father, He's a shepherd, right? You have all these metaphors, all these various ways that God reveals Himself to us in Scripture. And then you let that truth start challenging some of the beliefs that you have and let your faulty beliefs be overridden by what God says is true. And so there's other things that you can do. But, I mean, that's one of the really practical ways you can identify the false belief and then address it in Scripture.
I think that's what Paul is kind of getting at when he's talking about taking every thought captive to Christ. Essentially, you're taking a thought and you're comparing that to what God says is true in his word. And then you have a choice: Am I going to believe what God says is true or am I going to believe this liar distortion of the enemy? [00:34:55]
Laura Dugger: Okay. Then I just have one other follow-up question kind of related to everything mixed together that we've talked about so far. What about the believer who has made that decision? They've surrendered their life to Christ. Maybe they're feeling, if they're really honest with themselves, that something's a little bit lacking, it's not quite what they expected but they are not participating in any way. They're recognizing that Jesus' work is finished and they're settling for that, which is hard to even articulate when I say settling for that. But if you know what I mean, what encouragement would you give them and what danger do you see if they choose to continue that lifestyle?
Ken Baugh: Well, I think the danger is that they're going to be hindering their own progress in their relationship with Christ. It's not unlike marriage or any kind of a friendship if you're not married. It takes time to cultivate and nurture that relationship.
If I were to just tell Susan 35 years ago on the day we got married, I love you, and I haven't told her that for the last 35 years, then that's going to create a problem. [00:36:03] And we're going to have a different kind of relationship because I haven't cultivated and nurtured that love in a way that's demonstrative to her.
I think this is an important question, Laura, because I think a lot of Christians struggle with this idea of activity, that I'm supposed to do something that helps me grow in Christ. Because we have bought into this idea that grace is only about unmerited favor when it is that, but it's also about the unmerited power of God unto salvation.
So if you call it spiritual discipline, spiritual exercises, activities, whatever you want to call it, those activities themselves don't do anything. It's the Holy Spirit's work as we are doing those works that he works through those things, like reading scripture, to bring about a greater awareness, to bring about growth and understanding.
So if we don't take action on those things, we're going to stay very young in our faith. [00:37:03] We're not going to mature. We're going to be stuck on milk instead of solid food.
Laura Dugger: I pray that even this conversation is a catalyst for all of us to seek those deeper levels of relationship with God and to participate even more than we have in the past. Ken, this time has been fascinating, but if people want to follow up with you online after this conversation, where would you direct them?
Ken Baugh: I'd love to interact with your audience. So our website is idtministries.com. It stands for the Institute for Discipleship Training. Idtministries.com. We're in the process of getting ready to launch our own podcast. We already have a number of things up on YouTube. These are all free resources for folks. And I'll be doing some webinars on the book. And then we'll be also offering some subscription services for folks that want to dive deeper into the material. And then there's also coaching opportunities if they would like. So there's just a plethora of resources that are available that we're continuing to add to to really help people really experience the abundant life to a degree that maybe they thought was ever possible. [00:38:15]
Laura Dugger: That is so exciting. We will certainly link to all of that in our show notes to make it easy for people to find. And you may know that we're called The Savvy Sauce because "savvy" is synonymous with practical knowledge or insight. We would love to hear your practical life tips today. So, Ken, is my final question for you, what is your Savvy Sauce?
Ken Baugh: Oh, gosh. How about this? The Christian life is not merely about the forgiveness of sin so that you go to heaven when you die, but about becoming a new person, belonging to a new family, and therefore experiencing a new quality of life, of abundance, filled with more love, joy, peace, and hope than you ever thought possible.
Laura Dugger: Amen to that. Ken, thank you so much for teaching us freeing truth today. I sincerely appreciate you being my guest. [00:39:14]
Ken Baugh: Thanks, Laura. It's been great being with you. You ask great questions.
Laura Dugger: Thank you.
One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners and God is perfect and holy, so He cannot be in the presence of sin. Therefore, we're separated from Him.
This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only Son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute.
This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. [00:40:18] This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus.
We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
So would you pray with me now? Heavenly, Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change their lives now for eternity. In Jesus name, we pray, amen.
If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him, you get the opportunity to live your life for Him. [00:41:18]
At this podcast, we are called Savvy for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you're ready to get started?
First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision my parents took me to Barnes and Noble to get the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. Start by reading the book of John.
Get connected locally, which basically means just tell someone who is part of the church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.
We want to celebrate with you too. So feel free to leave a comment for us if you made a decision for Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process.
Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." [00:42:21] The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.
If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
Monday Aug 16, 2021
Monday Aug 16, 2021
149. Temperaments and Power of Words in Parenting with Kathleen Edelman
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)
Questions and Topics We Discuss:
-
How do we identify our children’s temperaments?
-
What are some common rubs between the color combinations of parents and children?
-
What is the potential for each combination working well together?
Kathleen Edelman has one goal in life: to help people learn to speak kindly to each other. She is certified in Biblical Studies and Christian Counseling Psychology and has spent more than 25 years coaching clients in the art of communication. She is married with two grown children and has a surprising passion for martial arts and pickup trucks.
Connect with Kathleen on Instagram @kathleenedelman
or Facebook @Kathleenedelman429
Previous Episodes with Kathleen Edelman:
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
A Grown Up's Guide to Kid's Wiring
Thank You to Our Sponsor: Sam Leman Eureka
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Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Monday Aug 09, 2021
Monday Aug 09, 2021
Top Ten from 2020: #1 Ordering Your Priorities with Kat Lee
“Now you [collectively] are Christ’s body, and individually [you are] members of it [each with his own special purpose and function].” 1 Corinthians 12:27 AMP
Kat Lee is passionate about teaching others how to jump-start each day with a grace-filled, life-giving morning routine. She is the author of the Hello Mornings book (published by Thomas Nelson), a speaker, podcaster, and the founder of HelloMornings.org. She and her husband, Jimmy, live in Waco, Texas, with their three children.
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Kat Lee’s Website: Hello Mornings
Books by Laura Vanderkam:
What the Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast
What the Most Successful People Do on the Weekend
What the Most Successful People Do at Work
168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think
Thank You to Our Sponsor: Dream Seller Travel, Megan Rokey
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Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Monday Aug 02, 2021
Monday Aug 02, 2021
Top Ten from 2020: #2 Five Love Languages with Dr. Gary Chapman
1 Corinthians 13:13 (NIV) “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
Gary Chapman, Ph.D.—author, speaker, pastor, and counselor—has a passion for people, and for helping them form lasting relationships. Chapman is a well-known marriage counselor and director of marriage seminars. The 5 Love Languages® is one of Chapman’s most popular titles, topping various bestseller charts for years, selling over twelve million copies and has been on the the New York Times best-sellers list continuously since 2007. Chapman has been directly involved in real-life family counseling since the beginning of his ministry years, and his nationally-syndicated radio programs air nationally on Moody Radio Network and over 400 affiliate stations.
For more information visit www.5lovelanguages.com
Thank You to Our Sponsor: Leman Property Management Company
At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Dr. Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages Website
The 5 Love Languages of Children
Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website
Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!
Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)
Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”