97 Guiding Our Children Through Their Emotions with Julie Roth

97. Guiding Our Children Through Their Emotions with Julie Roth

 

**Transcription Below**

 

Psalm 56:8 (NLT) “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” 

 

Julie Roth has been married to Marty for 14 years. They have three children ages 10, 9, and 6. She is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, has a Master’s degree in Human Development Counseling, and is currently pursuing a Master's in Counseling from Westminster Theological Seminary. She is on the Board of Directors at Peoria Rescue Ministries and has been a consultant to other ministries in the Midwest. She loves teaching the Bible, counseling, and watching Dude Perfect with her family. And while David says in Psalm 139 that we are all fearfully and wonderfully made, Julie admits to wishing that life as a mother did not come with such bags under her eyes!

 

Thank You to Our Sponsor: Peoria Christian Schools

 

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Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)

 

Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”

 

Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”

 

Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” 

 

Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” 

 

Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” 

 

Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” 

 

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

 

Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” 

 

Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

 

Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”

 

Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”

 

Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”

 

Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“

 

Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“

 

Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

 

**Transcription**

 

[00:00:00] <music>

 

Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.

 

[00:00:17] <music>

 

Laura Dugger: I want to say thank you to our sponsor, Peoria Christian School. They are raising a generation of 21st-century Christian leaders right here in central Illinois. Visit their website at peoriachristian.org. Thanks for your sponsorship.

 

It's a pleasure to introduce you to my guest and my friend, Julie Roth. She is a wise parent and gifted counselor, and you're going to love the creative ideas she shares to help us build relational capital in our family in order to guide our children well through their range of emotions. Here's our chat.

 

Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Julie. 

 

Julie Roth: I'm excited to be here with you, Laura. 

 

Laura Dugger: Well, it is always a blast to record in person, especially with a friend. So first, will you just tell the rest of our friends listening a little bit about yourself and your season of life? [00:01:18] 

 

Julie Roth: Sure, so I am married, have been married for 14 years, have three children. Their ages are 10, 9, and 6. I am a member at a local church here in the Midwest, and I am on the board of directors at a local rescue ministry. 

 

I have a master's degree in counseling, so I'm licensed in our state to do that profession, and I'm pursuing another master's in counseling through Westminster Theological Seminary, and I'll be done, Lord willing, next year. I have the opportunity to counsel in our church, counsel in the community, and I love mentoring and consulting, whether it be people or organizations, and I am dabbling in some public speaking.

 

Laura Dugger: That's awesome to hear that snapshot. I just want to say that something I admire about you is the way that you slow down to parent and understand your children's emotions. [00:02:23] So can you teach us what that actually looks like for you?

 

Julie Roth: I'll try. Slowing down is really a good description, I think, of it. For me to understand my children's emotions, it requires that I get to know them. I think for several years, I was under the impression that because my kids were birthed by me and they live with me all the time, that I somehow knew them fully and I kind of took it for granted. 

 

To understand their emotions, I first need to understand them uniquely. Even though I have three kids in the same home, parented hopefully the same, they are very unique. I need to focus on them individually to understand them. But then also to learn to understand how they speak and what language they speak. So essentially, I have to be really intentional to be a student of my children. [00:03:24] 

 

Laura Dugger: That's such a reminder that we all need to be intentional students of those around us who we love. So now for each of us, if we want to understand our own children's emotions and help guide them, what are some questions you recommend we begin to ask?

 

Julie Roth: I don't think that there are magical questions. These are some questions that I just started doing in trying to understand my kids. One of them would be to identify what do they value or what do they not value? I think that's really helpful for me with each of my kids. 

 

Also, what annoys them or what excites them? It helps me see the different facets of who they are and then how their different emotions will play out and what they will look like. 

 

Big ones for my kids beyond that would be, how are they encouraged? [00:04:24] That was a hard one for me to identify with two of my children. One was very obvious. 

 

So the flip question, which was more easy for me to answer, is how are they discouraged? Or when do I see my child deflate? Is it when they weren't recognized for something that they were really excited about and proud of or was it when they didn't get a reward? Was it when they received speech that was more harsh or stern? Was it when someone said something really mean? 

 

Those are just some examples of when I would see my children deflate. And it was usually in situations that were public or where I was observing them. 

 

For me, it's harder to observe my children be encouraged or discouraged when I am directly engaged with them because I am distracted by my own emotions or my own thoughts or my own agenda. [00:05:32] So that's where being a student and observer of my child is helpful because when they're interacting with friends or their dad or siblings, or teachers, then I can see when they get puffed up and when they deflate, if that makes any sense. 

 

Laura Dugger: That totally makes sense. I think those examples help drive it home. So even going back to that first one, you said, what do they value or what don't they value, are there any examples on the top of your mind?

 

Julie Roth: Sometimes it is through emotion. They'll be excited. Sometimes it's through action. So what are they protecting? What are they regularly carrying around? What do they bring in the car with them? Those are tangible objects.

 

But then what do they talk about? What is it that they go to bed thinking about and wake up thinking about that then they verbalize or they do when I'm observing them to see this is something really important to them? [00:06:37] 

 

Another question that's been really helpful in communicating with my children is, how are they motivated? One child may be motivated by what they can gain, what reward they'll receive, while another child might be motivated by what they can get away with. 

 

So I will talk with one child who they want to know the bare minimum that they have to do in order to avoid a consequence. That's a type of motivation, right? But the flip side, just like with the encouragement and discouragement, how are they discouraged? When do I see that they will not take action regardless? 

 

For one of my children, it would be when he feels that he has disappointed you, that he's behind, that he's already failed. For one of his siblings, they would be motivated when they feel like they're the underdog, and they would put forth a lot of effort to achieve something. [00:07:43] But for him, when he's the underdog, it almost paralyzes him. So that's really helpful for me in communicating with him as a parent because I'm going to approach them from a different angle if I'm needing to get them to take action in a certain area.

 

The last question that I'm regularly going through would be, what emotion or motions does this particular child regularly experience? Which ones do I not observe them experiencing a lot?

 

Then finally, what emotion do they follow blindly? With that last part, I mean, if one particular emotion hits a child and every time they experience that emotion they will not challenge it, but they will follow it wherever it goes, that is something that I do a mental check for and know that I'm going to be speaking in during the peace times so that I can do some training and educating of them. [00:08:55]  That when they enter into those emotions and follow blindly, now we have some language and a plan of attack. 

 

An example of that would be anger. When anger hits, there's no questioning, there's no challenge of whether this is good or not, whether it's appropriate or not, but one child will just go where that emotion takes them.

 

Laura Dugger: I think that really helps to understand it with an example of anger. Another one that comes up would be sadness, if they would go down that path. Are there any other ones that you've seen? 

 

Julie Roth: Shame, humor even. So joy, excitement. I think any emotion a person, whether they be a child or a parent, can almost become a slave to. They want to hold on tight for that ride because they interpret that emotion as being advantageous for them, whether it's a curiosity or a desperate need to see where it goes. [00:10:04] 

 

I think that each of us have at least one, if not multiple, emotions that we don't challenge and that we almost view as the leader or a best friend that we always want to be around even if they're not good for us.

 

Laura Dugger: That's so true. I think even in my own life at the new year was 2020 and I was listening to a message, a sermon, they were kind of talking about this topic and just what do you need to let go of in your life maybe that you don't even want a part of it, but you don't recognize how much it's taking over you? And for me, it was false guilt. 

 

So what you're saying, just following blindly, I don't want that to be a part of my life. But as a 34-year-old woman, I'm still battling that frequently. So how much more would our children be experiencing this? 

 

Julie Roth: That's right. I think that that's what makes me so excited about the opportunity to speak into our children to understand their emotions and then use scripture to help them rightly interpret their emotions. [00:11:11] Because if at age 5 or 9 or 15 they have tools and they're in a regular habit of utilizing those tools to discern, why am I feeling this way, is it appropriate, should I, is it biblical, if they're able to identify that there is an emotion there that might want to motivate or influence their thinking or actions, how beautiful the life that they get to navigate with those tools and that knowledge. 

 

Laura Dugger: It overflows into so many areas. And it's so life-giving to other people in addition to themselves. So now that you've laid this foundation and we have some of these questions we can begin to ask our kids, let's flip the script. What questions can we begin to now ask ourselves to make sure that we're approaching this with the correct posture?

 

Julie Roth: I started asking questions of myself because I kept finding myself failing with my communication with my children. [00:12:17] I would find myself almost at wit's end not understanding why the wisdom or truth that I valued was not connecting with them. And so I started to ask these questions. 

 

The first is, is this the right time for me to speak into my child? I think there are two components to that. One, where's my child at? So are they emotional to a degree that they're not able to hear me? So it could be super excited, it could be very tired, it could be angry.

 

When my children are tired, just to use that middle example, they are not good listeners. They don't have it almost in their body to either sit still or to focus. So I learned that it was foolish of me to use a lot of words during those times of my children being tired because it wasn't helping them. [00:13:19] It was torturing them, probably, and just infuriating me. 

 

So where are they at to maybe receive whatever wisdom that I want to share? But on the flip side, where am I at? And where are my emotions? Am I distracted? Am I tired? Am I angry? Am I pursuing their good or my own agenda? So there has to be that pause for me to say, "Okay, I've observed this in my child. I think it needs to be addressed. But is this the time to do it?"

 

Laura Dugger: I love it. So starting with taking inventory of where everyone is. Are there any other questions that you walk through for yourself?

 

Julie Roth: Absolutely. Once I determine that the message to be conveyed can be received, I need to check with myself, where are we at in the relationship? What relational capital do I have to speak into this particular child? [00:14:21] 

 

More often than not, it'll be okay. But there are times and seasons where when I will not necessarily connect with one child, and we just seem to be out of sync. And in those seasons, I really need to evaluate, am I the best person to speak into them or would maybe my husband be that person? Which means delayed gratification, right, for me. I have this message, I think it's really important, it is best for my child or maybe even best for our relationship if I hold on to it and allow a better person to speak in.

 

Or if it's not necessarily my husband to speak in and I feel like I think I should, what do I need to do to strengthen the relationship with this particular child before I speak in? So that might mean that we allow the intense emotion to dissipate and then we might have some fun. We might spend some time playing a game or playing outside, reading a book, just having some quality time one-on-one so that that particular child knows that when I speak with them I am for them and that relational capital then is secure for me to convey the message that I think that they need to hear. [00:15:47] 

 

Laura Dugger: And then it's probably more impactful to them at that time because they're also feeling secure in the relationship, right? 

 

Julie Roth: Exactly. Then the third, which is no doubt the most important for their understanding and navigating life, is where does Jesus enter into the situation? Or how is the gospel relevant to them in this moment? And then what does it look like? 

 

So, I think it's the most important, but I have to do the other work first to make sure that this important message and the pivot to Christ is received well and conveyed well.

 

With anger, where does Jesus enter in? How does Jesus have relevance to that particular child? What about sadness? It's a question that I'm always asking myself. [00:16:46] 

 

Here's another way to say it. How does the gospel inform my communication? The message and the way that I convey the message. So it comes to me and then I communicate it to my children. Where is Jesus in the situation and how is the good news relevant to them? 

 

I've mentioned anger. I think it is something that as a mother with three children, I see it often. When I'm talking with a child about their anger or my anger, we pivot to the cross and the relevance of the gospel. God's anger was poured out on Jesus so that we would be forgiven and that the stain of our sin would no longer rest upon us.

 

Laura Dugger: With that, if it's somebody's first time hearing this, and they want to use this example with their own children, what would their next step look like after explaining that to their kids? [00:17:53]

 

Julie Roth: I regularly will then communicate with my children, this is why mom needs Jesus too. So it's not just that you need Jesus because of your sin, you live with me, you see that I sin, we both need Jesus. Mom needs Jesus too. 

 

And I need Jesus not only as Savior who has allowed my sins to be forgiven but also I need Jesus as Lord to direct my path and guide me. So even though Mom has accepted Jesus in her heart and is forgiven, I still am very foolish and I need Him to guide me. And so I ask for forgiveness, but then I ask him to give me wisdom to know how to live life well and live life without sinning. 

 

Laura Dugger: The way that I've witnessed your life, it is so intentional and you're so thoughtful with this entire approach. I really appreciate you sharing all of that. [00:18:55] Just to catch everybody up, a little side note here. When our family moved to Illinois, multiple people were suggesting that I connect with Julie because they knew we would be fast friends. But it wasn't until we lived here almost four years that I finally got to meet Julie.

 

The first time we met was actually when she was a speaker at our mom's group. And that day, she spoke about unique ways we can practically apply this information, the topic that we're discussing today. So, Julie, will you share examples of how we can use scripture and games to connect with our kids?

 

Julie Roth: With scripture, I love using it. I'm usually late to use it because I want to do it on my own and it's not working. So then it's like, Oh, Lord, I forgot to go to your wisdom for myself. 

 

But I think the posture to use scripture is not to beat the child over the head with it. [00:19:59] It is employing, how do I understand this child to think? How do I understand this child to feel? Do I understand how they speak? Which is kind of what we're talking about. I'm going to use scripture and weave it into those areas so that they can understand it. I think this is the key to understanding our children. 

 

The purpose is, in one form, for us to learn the language they speak so that we interpret scripture into that native tongue for them. So using scripture is not, well, here's the memory verse, or you need to do this with the hitting of the fingers toward the child. It is using scripture to illuminate their mind and to draw their heart to the Lord because they have need for him. I'm going to use it carefully. I'm going to use it lovingly. [00:21:03] 

 

Laura Dugger: I remember one of the examples you used about this was about God collecting our tears. Can you share that story? 

 

Julie Roth: Sure. This was my daughter who was really sad and she was really feeling the blues. I didn't really know what to do. And so we were just sitting, holding hands as she was crying. I knew I could not change the situation. I knew that I could not take away her feeling. 

 

So we sat for a while, and the Spirit just brought to mind one of the psalms that tells us that God collects our tears. So I just asked her that question, do you know that the Bible says that God collects our tears? And instead of it being a speech that I gave her, which I'm sure happens all the time in our house, God really allowed me to ask questions. [00:22:09] 

 

So I inquired to her, why do you think he does that? Why would God collect tears the way your brothers collect Pokémon cards and you collect Shopkins? I think that's kind of strange. So she thought about it in her tears and she said, Well, I guess he thinks that they're important. And I said, Yeah, I think you're right. But why are they important? Isn't that kind of a strange thing to collect? 

 

At this point, the tears had kind of stopped and she was engaging her mind and pondering things of the Lord. I think that's the greatest distraction in our emotions. And it's not a distraction that we run to, I don't think, out of fear of feeling them, right? We're still feeling the emotion and also pondering: where is God in this emotion? [00:23:07] 

 

And by wondering about why God would collect tears brought us to that place, and she said, "Well, I guess God would collect tears and think that they are important because He wants to remember them." And I tell you what, I got chills because my daughter, who is in pain, is speaking truth into my heart. And I said, "I think you're absolutely right. He remembers them and he views them as important because you're important to Him and He sees you. There's nothing that you're experiencing that he doesn't recognize as important. And so He wants to remember that." 

 

Then we talked about, so if He's collecting these tears, that means He has to be really close because tears are close. They don't go out like a sneeze does. They stay close to our skin and they roll off. [00:24:11] So our God is near collecting them with us in the experience.

 

You know, it didn't change her circumstance. She was still sad. She wanted to talk with her dad about it. But there was a comfort that came as she considered that verse in scripture. It's a surreal comfort. It's that peace that surpasses all understanding of how we can experience a strong emotion, ponder who God is, still feel that strong emotion, and yet be okay in it, to feel that comfort, to know that we can overcome it because God is with us. 

 

And that's what happened later in that evening and even the next day. It was this recognition that she survived it. This emotion that was too large for her and was very overwhelming did not overcome her because God was near.

 

Laura Dugger: And now a brief message from our sponsor. [00:25:13] 

 

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Laura Dugger: For that last one, a little bit more lighthearted, you said you can use games to connect with your kids. 

 

Julie Roth: I love using games. It's fun and they're super engaged. You can use any type of game. It can be, you know, when you're playing ping pong back and forth. It can be when you're playing checkers. It can be when you're doing Jenga. 

 

Whatever truth or emotion that we need to talk about can be discussed in a game format. [00:27:22] I'm a counselor so a lot of my games that I will use with clients we do at home too and Jenga is one of those where I will number every Jenga block and put them in that tower and I have a corresponding list of questions or maybe actions that would be paired up with a number. 

 

So as we're playing Jenga, which is a competitive game of stacking blocks on one another and then trying to pull those blocks out without the tower falling, one of the children will pull out a number, then we look at the list and they have to answer that question. 

 

At first we might be playing the game, but every single time near the end we're really having good discussion back and forth and the children have to remind each other or I have to remind them, "Hey, whose turn is it? We need to actually keep playing the game." [00:28:24] But it's a great dialogue. 

 

Then when the children aren't really too much into it, answering the question that is, then we'll pull another block. It's just a way for us to have meaningful conversation about whatever topic while engaging in that fun side too. 

 

Laura Dugger: What would some of those corresponding questions sound like?

 

Julie Roth: If they were about emotions, it would be, what emotion do you feel the strongest? Or, what emotion do you not like to feel? Or, when I am at school, I feel (fill in the blank). "I am most hurt when someone says this."

 

It really is getting to know the children. I play too, so they get to hear Mom's perspective. When dialogue needs to take place or I sense that they want to talk more about it, we will. [00:29:27] 

 

Laura Dugger: Such a non-threatening way to really be intentional and get to the hard issues. 

 

Julie Roth: Absolutely.

 

Laura Dugger: Okay, let's just take this one step further so we can know how to practically apply this at home in relation to our kids experiencing various emotions. Do you mind just picking a few emotions and going deeper on each one?

 

Julie Roth: Sure. So we've talked about the blues. We've also briefly touched on anger, but maybe we take a little bit more time there because I do feel like anger is popping up a lot. I have a son who is very gentle, not at all aggressive, yet anger really clings to him and he will follow it blindly, like we were kind of referencing earlier.

 

We were talking about how emotions are, I think, designed to be more gauges rather than guides. A guide is someone to take you to different places and that emotions want to be a guide. [00:30:30] But they're really intended to be gauges. They're intended to give feedback to us about how we are experiencing a circumstance.

 

With anger, this particular child struggled to view it more as a guide, and he would follow it blindly. He really wasn't understanding that concept until he hit one of his siblings. And like I said, he is non-aggressive and very loving, would never hit someone, but in his anger he did, and it surprised him. It really caught him off guard and it disoriented him. He did not know why he did that. 

 

Now this was not immediate. Immediately he was very hot and angry. But when we gave him a cooling-off period and he was able to think more rationally and engage in conversation, I asked him if he would ever hit normally. He was very emotional to say no. And I said, "I agree. I've never seen you hit out of frustration, but this time you hit. Why do you think that was?" [00:31:50] He said, "Because I was really mad."

 

And I said, "I think you're right. But do you see how that anger, feeling mad, brought you to a place that you never would normally go? You normally live in, I am not a hitter, I love, I am not aggressive, and you followed the guide of anger to the destination of it is right and good for me to hit and I need to do it now." It connected with him. He understood how anger led him astray.

 

The problem with our emotions serving as guides is that more often than not, that guide wants to lead us farther away from God. Our emotions as guides generally do not direct us upward, they direct us outward or inward. [00:32:52] 

 

Another example. My son was playing outside with friends and he accidentally hit a friend in the face with a ball. Truly accidental. But his heart revealed that he was more concerned about himself and playing the game than caring for his friend. And so we used this God's design in the order of God, others, and self by looking at Legos and looking at the Lego instruction manual. 

 

I talked about how all of the steps were important, right? Equally important. So we flipped step 3, and then we flipped step 73, and I said, "So what if we were to swap, and we put 73 in 3's place, and 3 in 73? What do you think would happen?" And he said, "Well, that would not work at all." I said, "Well, why not?" He said, "Because they're not in the right order." And I said, "You're right." [00:33:55] I said, "The Lego design would look different, wouldn't it? And he said, "Yes. I don't even know that we'd be able to build it." And I said, "Yes." 

 

I said, "That's the same for God's design. When we misorder and put ourselves above others, it doesn't look the way that God designed it. And God's design is better than our design. 

 

I was sharing this with my sister, and her daughter is not into Legos, but her daughter does love crafts and coloring books. And in her coloring book, my sister found a Connect the Dot. And so she thought about my story with my son who struggles with the same things that her daughter does. So she used the Connect the Dot to say, "Let's start connecting the dots. One, two, three, four, five. What if we skipped six and we went to 13 instead?" And her daughter said, "No, mom, I can't do that. It won't look like it's supposed to look." And so my sister used that principle to speak in. "You're right, when we put things out of order, they don't look right. We're putting things out of order now with how we're treating our siblings. So what would be the right order? How do we do this?" [00:35:15] 

 

Laura Dugger: And we talk a lot on The Savvy Sauce about God being such a personal God, but I think this brings it to light that the Holy Spirit is our helper right there, readily available, and we can ask Him in these moments to give us examples like this to really communicate something in a way that's meaningful to our children. 

 

We love our audience. You are the friendliest people. If you ever have questions, or if you want to become a sponsor, or you would like to learn more about becoming a patron, please reach out to us in an email sent to info@thesavvysauce.com. You can also connect with us on social media at The Savvy Sauce.

 

We're called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. So as my final question for you today, Julie, what is your savvy sauce? 

 

Julie Roth: I think with parenting, and marriage probably too, it is laughter. [00:36:15] I so appreciate the role of mother and the hard work that it takes to be a mom that I don't always relax and have fun in it. That's not my natural state. My natural state would be to take this role, be super responsible, and then take the responsibility of God on myself as well. And that responsibility would be to soften my children's heart, to convict my children, and to rescue my children. 

 

I have a heavy responsibility to expose them to the God who does that, to model my need for that God. But I can't rescue my children. I cannot protect them in all things. I cannot be God to them. And so if I trust God to be God and I do the hard work of being a mom, that leaves me room to rest in God and then to have fun. [00:37:19] 

 

So laughter is my savvy sauce, even though it is not natural to me. And because it's not natural, I kind of have to infuse it into parenting. Some of the ways I do that would be to play games, like I said earlier. Games really help me lighten up and have fun with the kids, let them see my personality and not just my role as mom. 

 

Laughter through the Tickle Monster... As soon as I hear my kids' laughter, I will start laughing too. So I will start tickling and the Tickle Monster comes out and everyone starts laughing and it just lightens the mood and it connects us and bonds us in really sweet ways.

 

But there are other times when my heart does not want to be light. It does not want to laugh. It does not want to find rest in the Lord. I want to hold on to whatever mood I'm holding on to, and remembering who my children are and were, it's helpful. [00:38:24] 

 

So we'll look at old pictures, we'll watch old videos on my phone, we'll see the silly things that they've done, and inevitably my heart softens and we start laughing again. So laughter would be probably my savvy sauce.

 

Laura Dugger: I love it. Before I met you, Julie, so many people kept talking about your name and your great reputation, and they were absolutely right. I cannot even begin to express how grateful I am for you. I always learn so much through every conversation, and when we leave our time together, I feel very sharpened. So I'm sure everybody listening is just nodding along thinking the same thing. But thank you for being my guest today.

 

Julie Roth: It has been such a joy, Laura. I love it. 

 

Laura Dugger: One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. [00:39:25] Every single one of us were born sinners and God is perfect and holy, so He cannot be in the presence of sin. Therefore, we're separated from Him.

 

This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only Son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute.

 

This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. 

 

We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. [00:40:27] Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. 

 

So would you pray with me now? Heavenly, Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change their lives now for eternity. In Jesus name, we pray, amen. 

 

If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him, you get the opportunity to live your life for Him. 

 

At this podcast, we are called Savvy for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you're ready to get started? 

 

First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision my parents took me to Barnes and Noble to get the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. Start by reading the book of John. [00:41:35] 

 

Get connected locally, which basically means just tell someone who is part of the church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you. 

 

We want to celebrate with you too. So feel free to leave a comment for us if you made a decision for Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process. 

 

Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." The heavens are praising with you for your decision today. 

 

If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.