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Practical Chats for Intentional Living
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Monday Dec 03, 2018
Monday Dec 03, 2018
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Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.
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Laura Dugger: The principles of honesty and integrity that Sam Leman founded his business on continue today over 55 years later at Sam Leman Chevrolet Inc in EUREKA. Owned and operated by the Bertschi family, Sam Leman in Eureka appreciates the support they've received from their customers all over Central Illinois and beyond. Visit them today at Lemangm.com.
When I think about intentional holiday traditions, Shawn Mazelin is the first person who comes to mind. She has been a personal mentor of mine and many others. I've heard her grown children say how much they valued her intentionality and purposeful traditions. I hope you enjoy our chat.
Hi Shawn. Thanks for coming on The Savvy Sauce.
Shawn Mazelin: Hi Laura, it's great to be here.
Laura Dugger: For anyone who has not met you yet, can you just share a little bit about yourself?
Shawn Mazelin: I am in my 30th year of marriage. I have two adult daughters, two son-in-laws, a son that is a senior in high school, and another son that is a freshman in high school. [00:01:30] I work at a local maternity home for the last couple years, and I've been very busy with our church and other projects in the community.
Laura Dugger: And you have always poured so much into your family. Why was it important for you to make holidays special with your family?
Shawn Mazelin: You know, I think that it's so important to build memories. Those are more important, I think, than even the gifts that you can purchase. When my kids get together, even now as grown adults, they'll talk about some of the fun memories of growing up together and the things that we did, and the ways that we celebrated. But I never hear them talk about an item that was purchased. It's always about the quality time that we spent.
Laura Dugger: And for people that didn't know you as you were raising your children, were you a part-time working mom, a full-time working mom, stay-at-home mom? What did that look like?
Shawn Mazelin: You know, at various times in our marriage, I've done all of those things. It depended on how I needed to be the best helpmate to my husband. [00:02:35] We were also missionaries for 17 years of our marriage. And when you do that, you're living on faith support. So sometimes I would need to work a part-time job or a full-time job and sometimes God allowed me to stay at home full-time with my children.
So it was a different season for each time, but it was something my husband and I came together on and prayed through. So we had to learn how to be organized and to make family a priority because that was always my trump card. I didn't want my children and the things that were important to fall between the cracks because I was working outside the home.
Laura Dugger: Even in those really busy seasons, how did you carve out time to plan and prepare to make holidays special?
Shawn Mazelin: Well, I would do a little research before each holiday. I wanted my kids to have a clear understanding of what we were celebrating and why we were celebrating it. I think that's one of the keys to parenting is to give the "why" behind something and so that they understand it and make it their own. [00:03:43]
There's a lot of cultural ideas around every holiday. But most people don't realize there's a Christian meaning behind all the holidays. And so I wanted to dig to the root of each time and celebrate those moments.
For example, Christmas, everyone knows, you know, it's the birth of Jesus, but then there's also Santa Claus. Easter, you have the risen Christ, but then there's the Easter bunny. St. Patrick's Day, people talk about shamrocks and green beer, different things like that. And it's really about a man who became a Christian and went back to a country that had enslaved him and He taught the gospel.
As I go through and I look at those things, then we've talked about what is important. so for Christmas, I didn't always do it. You know, as young moms, you're kind of figuring different things out. But we had certain stories that we would share or movies that we would watch that were about the birth of Christ. And when we gave gifts to each other, it had a meaning to it. We look for places to serve and give to other people besides ourselves. [00:04:52]
Laura Dugger: Okay, friends, get your notebooks out if you're looking for ideas related to specific holidays or even birthdays. Shawn, let's spend some time and go through the whole calendar year so you can give suggestions. Let's begin with family members' birthdays. What traditions did you do?
Shawn Mazelin: When they were little, especially, our finances were very tight. So we couldn't afford to always go out for a big fancy dinner. But I would ask each child what their favorite dinner was and make that dinner on their birthday. And we would set the table very ornately.
So we would pull out our nicest dishes and might have a special Birthday placemats and champagne kind of a glass. I made a birthday plate. It's a glass plate. And you can hand paint it and you bake it. I've had it for the majority of their growing-up years. Now the paint's kind of all scratched off and it's not as pretty as it was when we first started but every time I talk about making a new one the kids all protest because they want me to still use that same plate for them. [00:06:00]
As we sit around and we eat your favorite meal and we have this really nice dinner, we go around the table and we say something that we value about that birthday person. So we take turns. It's really been amazing to watch my children bless each other and say things that are about their character traits that will build their siblings up.
Words have a tendency to take a root in your heart. And those things I've just watched bless our family so much to see positive and good things spoken over them. So we do that every year. And it's been amazing because as friends come in, or maybe they'll share their birthday with us, and we go around the table and friends are there.
We've watched people incorporate that in their families and in their homes. It isn't just about a cake and a present. It's about, hey, let's look at who you are on the inside. We notice who you are, how hard you work, how much you give, how funny you are, all of the good things about the person that God has created that's in our family. [00:07:05]
Laura Dugger: What about moving on to New Year's Eve and New Year's Day? Did your family do anything special for that?
Shawn Mazelin: You know, it's just simple. Sometimes we've had game nights and we'll all stay up and you know, I've made little hors d'oeuvres and we'll invite other families in and we'll have maybe a family versus family game night and keep score of whose families beat the other family and just made it a little competitive and had fun with it.
You know, we watched the ball drop or, you know, different things like that. It's just been more of a free night, but it's a night we've invited people in and just shared bringing in that new year.
Then as the clock strikes midnight, we usually stop and we pray together. And we bring that new year in with a prayer for the coming year and for the people in our lives and for our country and for our leaders.
Laura Dugger: And what about anything special you recommend for Valentine's Day?
Shawn Mazelin: Valentine's Day, I think that's just something that's in between your family. [00:08:04] I love to give all of my kids something sweet and remind them of the sweetness of God. I'll write them cards, or I'll do something for each one of them individually. But words of affirmation are a really big deal for us. So I like to write down things that I love about them, and then write down things that we see how God loves us and remind them that they're loved.
Especially as you're growing up and you're in school, sometimes you don't feel loved, and the enemy can come in and rob, steal some of the good things that God has done in your life. And so we want to remind our kids that they're loved, maybe when the world is cold and hard.
Then just my husband and I, we try to make sure that we go on a date because we want our kids to see us dating. We want our kids to know that we love each other. And I think it's healthy for the kids to know that we have family time, but we also have time for mom and dad.
Laura Dugger: I remember you sharing with a group that you mentored that you used a certain resource. I believe it was just called St. Valentine. [00:09:08]
Shawn Mazelin: Yes, it's just going back to the root of the history of how Valentine started. Valentine, this man, he was a priest and he was put into prison because he was marrying people at a time when marriage was illegal. The soldiers were supposed to be going off to war, and they thought the men would be distracted if they were married, so they made it illegal to be married. So this priest married people in secret.
As he was caught and put in prison, he was getting ready to be persecuted and put to death, he wrote a valentine to the jailer's daughter, and he signed it "My Valentine". As I've talked to my kids about this, we just talk about the importance of marriage and what are you willing to do to uphold what God has created and ordained, and how can we love each other?
You know, it's one of the biggest commandments is to love God and to love others. This holiday encompasses that. So we have a way to share that and say that and talk to others about it. [00:10:15]
Laura Dugger: I also remember that St. Patrick's Day was always one of your favorite holidays. Can you tell us more about that?
Shawn Mazelin: Sure. I love that day because it is about a man who was captured into slavery in Ireland and then he escaped and some Bishops found him, and he was taught the gospel, and he accepted Christ as his Savior. He went back to Ireland, and then he shared the gospel with people. And he shared it in a way that it impacted the entire nation.
The clover is a representation of the Trinity. It's what He used to teach about the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit—three separate things as one. So I love that day because when we eat dinner as a family on that day, we talk about who we need to forgive and how we can forgive, and how we can demonstrate love to others. [00:11:11]
So it isn't just about, you know, a green shamrock and luck of the Irish. It's about being intentional with the people around us and forgiving and living like Jesus asked us to.
Laura Dugger: Moving on to what Christians believe is the most important holiday, what did you do to teach your children about Easter?
Shawn Mazelin: Well, there's some really fun recipes that you can do where you can bake a marshmallow inside of a loaf of bread. And when you put it in and then you bake it and then the marshmallow, it dissolves and the kids can see an empty tomb. I had a little ceramic Tomb with soldiers and Jesus and Mary.
It kind of I would change the story every day of the week leading up to Easter. So Jesus would be walking into town and the kids, you know, would come through the living room and they would maybe see it on this table. And then the next day you would maybe see the soldiers there or you would see Mary there and then you would see Jesus crucified and you would see him and go into the tomb. Then on Easter, we would open it and he was gone.
We would just have tangible little things. And you can make those at home. There's lots of great things on Pinterest to show you how to make those. But just making sure that the kids knew what we're doing had a purpose and a meaning much bigger than an Easter bunny because our Savior gave His life for us. And so we wanted to help them to understand that as early as possible, that He died for us, but He's living in heaven and we can go there one day. That's hard for a little mind to capture. So there are some great tools out there for that. [00:12:52]
Laura Dugger: I love that. It reminds me of my own tradition growing up with my family. We would call them empty tomb rolls or resurrection rolls, kind of what you were speaking about. It was just a good visual aid as a child to start to understand a glimpse of this mystery.
But for anybody listening who wants to incorporate it, like Shawn said, you take a marshmallow, you roll it up in a crescent roll. And then you can dip it in butter and then roll it in cinnamon sugar and bake it and the marshmallow will disappear. So that's a great practical tip to apply today.
How about the 4th of July?
Shawn Mazelin: It was just a family time. Cookouts, sparklers, going to see fireworks. We have holidays as a priority with our kids. I know there's a lot of families that holidays roll around and everybody scatters and goes other places. But for us, it was another time for us all to come together and celebrate our nation. And maybe not in a way that was in a deep meaning because we have so much heaviness on so many other holidays, but just a fun time that we're celebrating our independence as a country. [00:14:02] I was having that time as a family.
Laura Dugger: What about Halloween? That can be a tricky holiday. So how did your family navigate it?
Shawn Mazelin: Sure. You know, when my husband and I were first married, I tended to swing very strictly on Halloween, and we didn't celebrate it at all. I had read many books and had a hard time with that holiday. People would come and knock at the door, and we wouldn't answer the door, and we'd pretend that we weren't home. And it really didn't accomplish anything.
So we didn't love that holiday, but we didn't really know what to do with it. Then churches started offering things to do. So we started to participate more in what our churches were offering. Then we did finally come to a point when we were at home and we would hand out candy and maybe hand out a track with it and explain what the gospel was to people. But the origination of that holiday is very pagan, and it's not something that we really had wanted to celebrate. [00:15:02]
So we drew some lines with what we were celebrating and how we celebrated it, and tried to talk through it with our kids. Why do they dress up with costumes? And why are they asking for candy? We wanted to explain to them that it seems simple, but everything has a meaning. We just wanted them to be cautious.
It's been amazing because, you know, I have one daughter that's grown up and she doesn't celebrate Halloween now. And I have another one that hands out candy at her door. But both of them, I think, would just participate with whatever at their church.
Laura Dugger: That makes sense. That gives freedom to each listener to use their own discernment, like you said, maybe to understand the meaning behind it. But what an incredible thing to help bring the light of Jesus and be able to redeem something so dark.
Shawn Mazelin: Right.
Laura Dugger: What do you like to do for Thanksgiving traditions?
Shawn Mazelin: We love to have a blessing jar where through the year you write things that you're grateful for. And we put them in the jar and we keep them throughout the year. Then on Thanksgiving we pass that jar around and everybody read one of them. [00:16:11]
There has been years where we haven't been great about keeping up with that. So maybe the day before we're scrambling to write things and put them in the jar so we can read it the next day. But we like to make sure that we do say something that we're thankful for.
And having family in, and again, making it special. Decorating the table, making it ornate and something that's more than just your average everyday dinner. So we pull out our nicest dinner glasses and our nicest plates and our nicest tablecloths and linen napkins and napkin rings and the nicest serving bowls. And it's a time that we really are coming together and saying, thank you, God, for all of these things and all of these people and all of these situations.
One thing that I've learned is life is very short and we don't know when the last time we'll all be together is. I've had holidays where the next year, maybe that family member was no longer living and we didn't realize at the time that was the last time we would have with that family member. [00:17:17] So making those moments special.
Then we also have a book that we pass around and everyone writes in that book what they're thankful for. We've had this one journal that we've written in for about 20 years. It's a pretty big book, but it's so fun to go back through that and see my children's little tiny kindergarten handwriting into their grown adult handwriting and see how their perception and gratitude has grown through the years as well.
Laura Dugger: Oh, that's such a great idea and neat keepsake. Maybe I was inspired by you. Something that we do because our kids are so little, each year, ever since they were born, on Thanksgiving, we just trace one of their hands, like the traditional turkey, and then we write to God five things that we're thankful for.
Shawn Mazelin: I love that.
Laura Dugger: We just stick it in this Thanksgiving book that we have and we can pull it out and see how their little hands have grown over the years and their prayers of gratitude.
Shawn Mazelin: I love that. [00:18:22]
Laura Dugger: Okay, well, we saved the biggest holiday for last. What Christmas traditions or meals do you recommend?
Shawn Mazelin: Well, Christmas tradition, you know, there are the fun things, the stockings, those fun things that we can hang up and put up. I think my kids have always enjoyed their Christmas stockings more than anything that they've ever received as a tangible gift.
But we go ice skating every Christmas Eve. We try to get all dressed up after that and we go to a very nice restaurant as a family. There's an older mansion of a house here in the area that's turned into a restaurant. We love to go to this place and go for an elegant dinner. You know, just to have something that stands out with the kids.
We do that on Christmas Eve. Then Christmas morning, everyone wakes up, and you're in your Christmas pajamas and you're always opening one gift on Christmas Eve. And it's always pajamas. They put those on, and they sleep in them, and they wear those for Christmas morning. [00:19:25]
Then we have that opening our gifts. And while we're opening our gifts, I've got a Christmas casserole that's cooking. So after that, we're going into and having a big brunch. And then everyone's playing with their items or, you know, whatever they've gotten for Christmas. And then we transition into the afternoon with a big dinner and family and just people coming in or friends coming in or maybe people that don't have family in the area coming over and just having that time of having the time together.
But my husband always reads the Christmas story and shares that. And we just take that time and remember God sending His Son. We read that as a family and we again have a time of prayer and we just celebrate who Jesus is. We're so grateful for that.
We may watch, you know, the Nativity movie or other Christmas movies and just try to prepare our heart the whole time, not just for the things that people are going to buy that are under the tree, but our heart for who lives there. [00:20:29]
Laura Dugger: You mentioned a breakfast casserole. Even getting really practical, for someone who's listening and maybe they're a mom and they feel overwhelmed at Christmas time, did you make some of that food ahead of time so you could be more fully present that day?
Shawn Mazelin: I did. I usually made that on Christmas Eve morning because I told you we have a very full activity day and we're running. So I just would even take... it depends what I had and where we were, but you know, just eggs, spinach, maybe some bacon crumbles, cheese, mix it all up and let it sit in the fridge overnight and then bake it the next day.
Laura Dugger: You shared a really great recipe that was a French toast casserole. Do you remember that?
Shawn Mazelin: I do. I don't have the recipe in front of me, but yes, that French toast recipe is one that you make. Actually, I think it's an Amish French toast recipe. You can make it the day before, it sits in a refrigerator overnight, and then it just bakes while you're opening presents, and it's so easy. [00:21:34]
Laura Dugger: And it smells the whole house, and you can even start to associate those smells with Christmastime as a memory.
Shawn Mazelin: Yes.
Laura Dugger: Well, are there any other resources that come into mind that you want to highlight with any of these traditions? Oftentimes we think of food or resources or time spent together. Is there anything else you would add?
Shawn Mazelin: With Easter, I have resurrection eggs that we share. You can order them from Family Life. We go around the table and everyone opens one egg on Easter day and it tells you part of the Easter story. And that is always a fun thing for the kids and the adults to do is to open that up and to see the different parts of the aspects of Easter. [00:22:20]
But as far as preparing meals and making things special, pull in your heritage. Pull in something that was something maybe your grandmother made. I'm Italian, so we make meatballs on New Year's Day, which is always a fun thing. I make those the day before, and then they're in the crock pot the whole day on New Year's Day. We just try to pull in some of our heritage and make it special and unique to us.
Maybe something I don't do every time or every week, you know, pull out those things that mean something to your family. One of the things that I've tried to teach our kids, the verse that's Proverbs 22:1, it says, "A good name is more desirable than great riches. To be respected is more than gold or silver." I want my kids to know who they are. That's why we do those things in our holidays as family, because I want them to embrace being a Mazelin, embrace being who God created them to be, and to know that that is a fulfilling thing to guard your... your reputation, it's more desirable. And to feel the roots of their heritage. [00:23:34]
So finding those things that are special and unique to your family, or maybe your husband's family. Maybe his grandma made something special that you want to bring in and incorporate and pass on. Or maybe there's a book or something that they read from years ago that you want to incorporate in your family and pass on as a legacy. So looking for those things that are already there that we don't have to reinvent.
Laura Dugger: I've never thought of that before. We're going to link to quite a few resources and ideas in the show notes just so people can come here, grab whatever tip works for their family, and hopefully be inspired to create some memories today.
Now a brief message from our sponsor.
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Laura Dugger: Hey, friends, I just wanted to give you a quick reminder that we're asking for ratings and reviews on whatever platform you use to listen to this podcast. If you would be willing, could you also hit subscribe to the podcast and share this with a friend? Thanks for listening. Now back to the show.
We are called The Savvy Sauce because "savvy" means practical knowledge or discernment. So, Shawn, as we conclude today, what is your savvy sauce?
Shawn Mazelin: My savvy sauce is taking my family and letting them know how greatly they are loved, to be that encourager. Sometimes as a mom we become very heavy and we can become about correcting and training, but we forget the loving, the kind, the fun, the investing part of it.
So my savvy sauce today would be to be the encourager and to look for the creative, fun ways to build memories into your family. [00:26:42]
Laura Dugger: You have such a heart of encouragement, and thank you for sharing all of that with us today.
Shawn Mazelin: Thank you.
Laura Dugger: One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners and God is perfect and holy, so He cannot be in the presence of sin. Therefore, we're separated from Him.
This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only Son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute.
This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. [00:27:48] This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus.
We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
So would you pray with me now? Heavenly, Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change their lives now for eternity. In Jesus name, we pray, amen.
If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him, you get the opportunity to live your life for Him. [00:28:48]
At this podcast, we are called Savvy for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you're ready to get started?
First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision my parents took me to Barnes and Noble to get the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. Start by reading the book of John.
Get connected locally, which basically means just tell someone who is part of the church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.
We want to celebrate with you too. So feel free to leave a comment for us if you made a decision for Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process.
Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." [00:29:51] The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.
If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
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